[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hey, you.
[00:00:00] Speaker B: Come over here.
[00:00:02] Speaker C: What is it? Mysterious person in that shadowy alley?
[00:00:05] Speaker A: Check out what I got under my trench coat. Whoa.
[00:00:09] Speaker C: Is that a subscription to Pork fried dice on Ko Fi?
[00:00:12] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:00:13] Speaker A: See, it says tinyurl.com supportpfd neato. Hey, while you're here, you wanna buy some crack?
[00:00:24] Speaker C: You're listening to the show about playing fetch while the world ends. It's Pork Fried Dice.
I'm Eric, and I'm the dungeon master.
[00:00:36] Speaker E: I'm Abby, and I play Rafina.
[00:00:39] Speaker F: I'm Alex and I play Batwack.
[00:00:42] Speaker A: I'm KT and I play Will.
[00:00:46] Speaker G: I'm Adam and I play Roscoe.
[00:00:51] Speaker C: Hold on to your haversacks. Let's roll.
[00:00:57] Speaker G: This is chaos.
[00:00:58] Speaker C: It's done.
[00:00:59] Speaker A: Oh, my God. He loves to torture me with that. I hate it.
Guys.
[00:01:13] Speaker F: Stop. It. Just.
[00:01:19] Speaker A: Eric doesn't have anything planned. That's why this is where we are right now. He's just like, what's happening? Can we just play a bunch of sound effects? Poor Moe. Moe needs something better than just holding.
[00:01:30] Speaker C: The rope the whole time.
[00:01:31] Speaker A: Yeah, but he just has a knife, like, and Shimmy doesn't have anything, but anyway, Mo Moe, that's what we're doing in this pugilistic society we're headed to. And I look at Bathwhack. I look at Kick Bathwack. This pugilistic place we're going to. We're gonna get you the best weapon.
[00:01:48] Speaker G: I kind of want the shopkeep to die, but I don't want us to be the ones to kill him. Can we say, like, what? Maybe I can roll for, like, my boa constrictor, like, got away and is coming to attack the shop.
[00:02:02] Speaker B: Key.
[00:02:03] Speaker A: Perfect.
[00:02:03] Speaker E: Would that like.
[00:02:04] Speaker G: Like a luck roll?
Like, I roll a D20.
[00:02:07] Speaker C: Wait, let's.
[00:02:08] Speaker D: How about this?
[00:02:09] Speaker C: Okay, I sold. You have to roll me an animal handling check. And the more poorly you roll. Yes. The more likely that is.
[00:02:17] Speaker G: More likely?
All right, let's see.
[00:02:21] Speaker E: You know, my daughter and I both died from snake bites in Oregon Trail last night.
[00:02:26] Speaker C: So, like, you can assist now.
[00:02:28] Speaker E: Rafina is gonna die from snake bite.
[00:02:31] Speaker C: Oh, you can assist then. Abby, roll a D4 and we'll subtract that from ever. Whatever. Roscoe gets 11.
[00:02:37] Speaker A: Of course. It's right in the middle.
[00:02:39] Speaker G: Minus. Minus a D4. Roll a D4.
[00:02:42] Speaker E: I'm trying enchantment.
[00:02:44] Speaker A: If it's a two, that's annoying. Abby, don't roll a two. A one.
[00:02:48] Speaker G: Minus one.
[00:02:48] Speaker C: So it's like that was exactly in the middle.
[00:02:50] Speaker A: Right in the middle.
[00:02:51] Speaker E: No, but I'm lucky, right?
[00:02:56] Speaker A: That's not the way.
[00:02:57] Speaker E: I know how D4s work.
[00:02:59] Speaker A: Abby knows everything about D4s, Adam. How?
[00:03:01] Speaker C: Strap in. You thought we were off track before.
[00:03:04] Speaker E: Strap in.
[00:03:05] Speaker G: That is not the way D4s work. D4s works by mitochlorians.
[00:03:11] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:03:14] Speaker C: He's a prequelist.
[00:03:18] Speaker A: Is that a real term?
[00:03:19] Speaker C: I don't know.
[00:03:20] Speaker A: That's a good one, though.
[00:03:21] Speaker G: And I love that. That's a great term prequelist.
All right, so a 10.
[00:03:27] Speaker C: Yeah.
The snake starts to slither. You didn't even realize you transformed it. You must have just been practicing it in your head or something like that.
But the staff transforms into a snake and begins slithering away.
Roscoe, you realize you're startled and go to catch after it. And you get it, like, halfway up its giant body rather than just say the word to turn it back into a staff.
And you kind of get it and you're like, halfway in. And then it slithers out of your arms and it slithers away. And then you go after it again and you kind of pick up half of it, and then it slithers away. And this all happens. Everybody's just like watching what's going on? There's like, nothing.
[00:04:11] Speaker G: It's happening in the background.
[00:04:14] Speaker C: No, it's slowly getting closer and closer. Yeah, it started like 10 minutes ago, but everyone's watching. Yeah. They're in the middle of this whole conversation and you're not even in focus at first. And it's like super long established shot of this conversation with this happening in the background. And then suddenly you move into focus and everybody sees you and is just taken aback, but the camera still stays. And you move even closer and closer. And then you bump into the camera and the camera is shooting up at the sky and you stumble over the camera. And then finally it cuts.
[00:04:50] Speaker A: The snake eats the camera.
[00:04:52] Speaker C: Yeah. It travels through its entire digestive system.
[00:04:55] Speaker A: Yeah, we get to watch that.
[00:04:57] Speaker C: And then it sits in there. And then the face of the shopkeep meets the camera as it's sitting in the gut of the snake. Right. That's how it would happen. Right?
[00:05:07] Speaker A: Oh, then you realize later. Yeah, that's got fucked up.
[00:05:10] Speaker G: Like he. Did the snake eat the shopkeep?
[00:05:16] Speaker A: No, no, he.
[00:05:19] Speaker C: You guys killed him. And that's his ghost floating through the intestine of the snake.
[00:05:23] Speaker A: We just murdered him. It was great.
[00:05:26] Speaker C: The perfect crime.
[00:05:27] Speaker G: I just want him. I just want him dead.
[00:05:29] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:05:30] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:05:30] Speaker C: Eventually you're able to scramble up scraather up. How do you. What is it gathering a snake. Scrather, I think, is the right.
[00:05:39] Speaker A: You scra.
[00:05:40] Speaker E: Is that a word?
[00:05:41] Speaker C: It sounds like it is, right?
[00:05:43] Speaker G: No, it doesn't. I think you're overestimating.
[00:05:45] Speaker C: That's like, from that game, that jackbox game where you have to make up definitions and then make up the word.
[00:05:50] Speaker A: We should do that.
[00:05:51] Speaker C: No, one of the ones you like.
[00:05:54] Speaker G: The original Balder Dash.
[00:05:57] Speaker C: Yeah, Scrather.
[00:05:58] Speaker G: Before jackbox, there was Balder Dash.
[00:06:00] Speaker C: Yeah, before Balder Dash.
[00:06:04] Speaker D: Wait, Taboo, there was Taboo.
[00:06:07] Speaker C: Before taboo, there was scattergory.
[00:06:11] Speaker E: Poo sticks.
[00:06:13] Speaker A: Poo sticks.
[00:06:16] Speaker C: Poo sticks.
[00:06:17] Speaker A: Okay, what's happening?
[00:06:18] Speaker C: Abby's old enough. She played with poo sticks.
[00:06:22] Speaker G: Does anybody else have any ideas for how to cause this guy's death?
[00:06:29] Speaker E: So he definitely didn't die because of this.
[00:06:31] Speaker C: Wait, wait. You scrathered up the snake, like, right in front of the boat?
[00:06:36] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:06:36] Speaker C: And the snake. All of you watching, you think the snake was just kind of randomly slithering in Roscoe's mind, though? He was coming for the shopkeep.
[00:06:44] Speaker G: Yeah, Roscoe was.
[00:06:48] Speaker C: That's what a ten gets you.
[00:06:50] Speaker G: All right, well, this is dnd, guys. What else? How else can we fail in a way that results in this man's death?
[00:06:57] Speaker E: Rafina refuses to participate in killing somebody just because.
[00:07:00] Speaker G: It's not Rafina. It's. It's us. It's just you.
[00:07:03] Speaker E: Oh, I see. But all we have to do is get Moe to let go of the rope, and he goes away.
[00:07:09] Speaker D: I don't think that enough for Roscoe.
[00:07:12] Speaker G: I don't think it's gonna be that easy. I think we're fucked.
[00:07:15] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:07:15] Speaker E: We're stuck with him for life.
[00:07:17] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:07:17] Speaker G: I think this man is a legitimate threat. Not in terms of the narrative, but just a threat to our sanity as players. Because look at what's happened. Look at what happened to this game.
[00:07:27] Speaker C: Oh, my goodness gracious.
[00:07:28] Speaker G: Ever since he showed up.
[00:07:30] Speaker A: Get the fuck out of here and not. Don't you throw pies at him.
[00:07:34] Speaker C: You're saying all this, and it's been less than 10 sessions since a ferret slithered out of a man's gullet.
[00:07:42] Speaker E: Do you have any maternity bras for sale, Sir?
[00:07:46] Speaker A: Alex is going to kill him. Look out.
[00:07:49] Speaker C: Go away, guys.
[00:07:51] Speaker A: Oh, no. Do it, Alex.
[00:07:52] Speaker G: Do it. It's your turn, Alex. Come up with a plan.
[00:07:58] Speaker C: Oh. Anyway, are you gonna let go of that rope there?
[00:08:04] Speaker D: Should I?
[00:08:06] Speaker A: Will nods.
[00:08:07] Speaker G: Yes.
[00:08:08] Speaker C: First nod. Let's go. The rope.
[00:08:10] Speaker D: Oh, I was getting tired.
[00:08:12] Speaker A: You were.
[00:08:14] Speaker D: I know.
[00:08:14] Speaker C: I keyed.
[00:08:15] Speaker D: I kid.
[00:08:17] Speaker C: He's triumph.
[00:08:18] Speaker A: Yeah, he's triumph.
[00:08:21] Speaker C: Well, it was nice to have met you all.
[00:08:25] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:08:26] Speaker G: Bye.
[00:08:27] Speaker E: Thank you.
[00:08:27] Speaker C: Bye. Here, have a final souvenir. And he tosses. And something flashes in the air.
[00:08:34] Speaker A: It's a bomb.
[00:08:36] Speaker G: Yeah. This is bad.
[00:08:37] Speaker C: It looks like a bowling ball with a candle stuck in it.
He narrates as it flies through the air, apparently.
And Rafina, you catch it, and it's a brass lighter.
[00:08:54] Speaker E: Oh.
[00:08:55] Speaker C: With a little. Just. It's not even know any words. It's just a little pictogram, but it's clearly his little traveling boat.
[00:09:02] Speaker A: A lighter.
[00:09:03] Speaker G: Like a business.
[00:09:04] Speaker A: Oh, wow. A lighter.
[00:09:06] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:09:07] Speaker A: Fancy.
[00:09:09] Speaker G: Worst businessman ever. He's giving away these, like, bespoke lighters to everybody he meets as business guards.
[00:09:17] Speaker E: Okay, bye. Thank you. Hey, Roscoe, check for this. I don't know.
[00:09:21] Speaker A: Is it a curse lighter?
[00:09:23] Speaker E: A cursed lighter?
[00:09:25] Speaker G: Roscoe, do an arcana check.
[00:09:28] Speaker B: I know a. I know a great organic.
[00:09:31] Speaker A: Organic.
[00:09:33] Speaker B: I'll give you a good deal.
His name is Roscoe. It's me. And I rolled a 23.
[00:09:41] Speaker A: Nice.
[00:09:42] Speaker C: 23.
You think that it's definitely not cursed. It maybe has some sort of minor magical enchantment.
Roscoe can say, is this guy leaving?
[00:09:59] Speaker A: I'm like, hurry to Trent. Oh, I'm on my way. I'm like, this guy's gonna fail.
[00:10:06] Speaker E: Bye, Will. That was so smart of you to bring up the fact that he had to go fast because I had forgotten that it needs to be. It's probably being guaranteed by the ferret captain, who's dead.
[00:10:21] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:10:21] Speaker E: And so that serves so many purposes. So if the vouchers don't end up working for him, then we have a reason why they should work.
[00:10:29] Speaker A: Who's gonna know?
[00:10:30] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:10:30] Speaker B: Let me see this. Let me see this lighter here. Let me see this, because I think it's not Koist.
[00:10:36] Speaker G: I think.
[00:10:38] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:10:38] Speaker G: Let me.
[00:10:38] Speaker B: Let me light this lighter here to see what magical effect it may have.
[00:10:44] Speaker C: Do you give him a lighter, Rafina?
[00:10:46] Speaker E: Yes.
[00:10:47] Speaker C: Okay. And you light it, Roscoe?
[00:10:51] Speaker G: Yes.
[00:10:51] Speaker C: Okay. He.
With two or three clicks, the lighter lights. And instead of just the normal little orange flame, this bright white light sort of shoots out of it for a second, and then this white flame remains, like, pure white. And then I need everybody to give me a dexterity saving throw.
[00:11:15] Speaker G: Oh, no. Dust queen. Dusk queen. This was the signal. It's the signal we accidentally. I knew this was gonna happen last session. I was like, it's gonna be so good, a bright light. I forgot all about it.
[00:11:29] Speaker C: Dex save plus potentially plus a bonus from Kick if he considers you his Ally.
[00:11:35] Speaker A: Oh, I rolled a five. That's my bad roll.
[00:11:39] Speaker C: What bonus is it, Alex?
[00:11:43] Speaker F: I think it's plus five.
[00:11:44] Speaker C: Plus five. Okay.
Roscoe and Rafina keep their feet, and Will and Kick are thrown prone, as is Shimmy.
Moe keeps his feet as well as the islet that you're on surges forth towards Ace's boat as it's sailing off towards Trent. He was kind of booking it a little bit.
And I'm getting what I want. You're thrown. Some of you are thrown to the ground.
I don't know. Can you.
[00:12:25] Speaker A: Well, I don't know. Do we have to roll?
[00:12:28] Speaker C: Well, you just rolled a Dex save. You could say something as this is happening.
[00:12:34] Speaker G: Do we all know about Bathwack's signature?
[00:12:37] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, I guess we might not. I don't know. When did he.
[00:12:40] Speaker C: Private.
[00:12:41] Speaker A: I don't know. I mean, the duck queens, she.
[00:12:44] Speaker C: You always hear.
[00:12:45] Speaker A: Every time she talks, we hear her because she was asking for a signal.
But I don't know if we would have. I don't know if I was close to Bathwack when he replied. I don't.
[00:12:55] Speaker C: Or cared.
[00:12:57] Speaker A: Well, no, I definitely would have cared because we were talking about destroying ships.
So. Yeah. I mean, I don't know if I would care so much to scream right away, but if she's lurching forward.
[00:13:10] Speaker C: All right, well, it's not worth dwelling on. It wouldn't have mattered. Cause she's. What?
[00:13:16] Speaker A: She's gonna kill this guy.
[00:13:17] Speaker C: Oh. I thought you were laughing in a weird, laughy voice.
[00:13:20] Speaker A: I was, but nervous. Nervous, laughy.
[00:13:23] Speaker C: I thought it was the thing you do something where you laugh at a joke that is clearly not funny. I do like one of those laughs.
I couldn't hear you through my headphones, I think. Anyway.
Yeah. The islet rushes towards the boat. The eye stays closed, and it kind of skids under the boat slightly and then shoots up into the air about 20ft.
So you're all kind of thrown into the air now as the boat flies up into the air, the islet slowly, you thump back down, and the eyelet slowly returns back to the surface of the water as the boat crashes down into the water and pretty much it shatters.
[00:14:17] Speaker A: Oh.
Oh, God. Is the guy dead?
[00:14:22] Speaker C: Probably.
[00:14:23] Speaker A: Really?
[00:14:24] Speaker C: You would assume so.
[00:14:26] Speaker G: All right, well, I. I do. I feel kind of bad, though.
[00:14:30] Speaker A: I feel really bad.
[00:14:33] Speaker G: I was the one rooting for his death.
[00:14:42] Speaker A: Will gets up and flies over that area, just kind of surveying like the whole boat exploded.
[00:14:50] Speaker C: Not exploded, like, just was.
[00:14:52] Speaker A: Yeah, 20ft.
[00:14:53] Speaker C: Well, you. How big was pilot shot 20ft and stopped.
[00:14:58] Speaker A: And so how far in the it got flung? Yeah, really far.
How far?
[00:15:05] Speaker C: Far enough for the effect that I described would have occurred.
[00:15:09] Speaker A: Wow.
[00:15:12] Speaker C: You can give me investigation or perception while you do that. Mo says everyone.
[00:15:18] Speaker E: Okay, I'm still on my feet. That's my good core muscles.
She mimics being on a surfboard. But wait a second. What's going on with the boat? Is it squished?
[00:15:36] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:36] Speaker D: It fly way up behind sky and then smoosh down on water.
[00:15:41] Speaker E: I guess that guy's probably not okay.
[00:15:47] Speaker A: Whoo. Rafina, you are something that I never expect have to say.
[00:15:55] Speaker D: What do you mean?
[00:15:57] Speaker A: I felt like Rafina would be more upset by something like that, but.
[00:16:02] Speaker E: Well, I. I feel like it was an act of the gods. And yet.
And yet.
I don't know.
I feel like it was meant to be.
[00:16:14] Speaker A: Yeah, he wasn't going to be successful anyway. Plus, those vouchers probably weren't worth anything, so. Good job, guys. We got some loot. Hey, I hold up the pies.
Think about it.
[00:16:30] Speaker B: It was his own lighter that caused his demise. He by his own bo.
[00:16:38] Speaker E: I guess that was the signal, huh?
[00:16:42] Speaker G: Yeah, I guess. I don't know how to play.
[00:16:43] Speaker A: I. I really thought that.
[00:16:45] Speaker G: That. I remember that being like, a private interaction before the thing.
[00:16:49] Speaker E: It was not private, but it was.
[00:16:52] Speaker A: Not, like, in his head or anything like that. I'm pretty sure I was at least near there. Like, we. We. We. A lot of the. I know that the anything the Dust Queen has said is out loud because every time I've had an interaction with her, everyone can hear at least.
So I'm pretty sure Bathwack and I were talking. You might not. Roscoe might not have been there, but I'm pretty sure I knew it.
But, yeah, again, I don't know. I mean, I think that if the. If the. If the Dusk Queen moved so quickly, I don't know if Will would have even realized what was happening, because it's just a lighter. But, like, was it a huge light?
[00:17:28] Speaker C: Like, it's just like a really bright flash.
[00:17:31] Speaker A: Wow, that must be like. That's a crazy lighter. Like, I feel like that's a cr. It's a flare. I mean, it's not a lighter. It's a flare. So if our DM is really gonna say that that lighter makes the Dust Queen attack, then I don't know if Will would necessarily have expected that to happen in the first place. Like, we get knocked off our feet, the thing is launched, Then we see a chatter. I think That's. Maybe Will is just feeling like, oh, this. This is why I'm trying to be polite to the Dust queen, because. Holy. That was scary.
[00:18:10] Speaker G: We see a body.
[00:18:12] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:18:12] Speaker C: Did you roll an investigation of perception?
[00:18:15] Speaker E: And are all the. Are all the goods shattered?
[00:18:19] Speaker G: Let's at least grab that club.
[00:18:23] Speaker A: Exactly.
Perception.
[00:18:26] Speaker G: And get those vouchers back. We can.
[00:18:30] Speaker A: 18 investigation.
[00:18:36] Speaker C: You see a body bobbing in the water.
[00:18:41] Speaker E: Can Rafina find one of the vouchers in the water?
[00:18:44] Speaker C: Give me.
[00:18:45] Speaker E: Can she reach any of them?
[00:18:46] Speaker C: Oh, not from. You would have to go over there. You're not the. The eye is not close enough for you to physically reach the detritus yet.
[00:18:59] Speaker E: Okay.
So we see the body.
[00:19:02] Speaker C: Well, Will saw the body from up. He flew over.
[00:19:06] Speaker E: Oh, he flew. That's right. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Yeah. Hey, Will.
[00:19:10] Speaker A: Yeah, I'll come back.
What?
[00:19:15] Speaker E: Can you please find a voucher? I want to write on one to forward the body to a Trent funeral parlor and they can use the voucher to pay for his funeral.
[00:19:27] Speaker A: He's floating in the water over there. Rafina. I don't think Trent's going to give a shit.
[00:19:33] Speaker E: But how else is he going to get a burial?
[00:19:35] Speaker A: Rafina?
Does any man. Am I growing a heart? What the fuck? That guy just got obliterated by this thing. I look down below our feet. Okay.
[00:19:48] Speaker G: I am very interested in. Yeah.
[00:19:50] Speaker C: Well.
[00:19:51] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:19:51] Speaker G: Are you growing a heart? You seemed very annoyed by it.
[00:19:55] Speaker A: Yes. He was not going to be successful in life. But I do feel weird that I just actually negotiated. Huh?
[00:20:02] Speaker D: You were right. I mean, he was not very successful.
[00:20:06] Speaker G: He did not end up being successful.
You called it.
[00:20:14] Speaker A: Yeah. Mo.
I don't want to be like that. Mo. I don't.
[00:20:22] Speaker D: Didn't you try to blast it with eldritch?
[00:20:23] Speaker E: Blast.
[00:20:24] Speaker A: I specifically didn't hit him. What's wrong with me? Guys?
[00:20:28] Speaker D: I thought you was wrong.
[00:20:29] Speaker A: I was just trying to help him go start a business. And this guy didn't know what the hell was going on. And I talked to him for a while now. I care a little bit that he's dead.
Guys.
[00:20:40] Speaker B: But we haven't done a medicine like.
[00:20:42] Speaker G: Okay, I'm gonna.
[00:20:43] Speaker B: I'm gonna swim over there and I'm gonna see if we can save him still.
[00:20:47] Speaker E: Oh, I thought you were gonna do a medicine check on Will to see what was wrong.
[00:20:50] Speaker A: You want me to just fly over there and drag him back and see? He might just be pulp. You know, I don't think a medicine check. No.
[00:20:57] Speaker G: I'm gonna Swim.
[00:20:58] Speaker A: Okay?
[00:20:59] Speaker G: Because I'm gonna grow a heart, too. Look at us. We're the heart crew.
Roscoe's gonna swim over.
[00:21:07] Speaker E: Look at us. We're the heart crew.
[00:21:09] Speaker G: Willis, like, Roscoe swims over, okay? And does a medicine check on this body.
[00:21:19] Speaker C: Okay.
Roscoe's a good swimmer.
[00:21:24] Speaker G: Yeah, he's got a bathing suit and everything. He. He didn't put on mustard to go for this swim.
[00:21:35] Speaker C: 7.
You do believe that he is dead?
[00:21:41] Speaker G: Yeah, he's dead, all right.
I don't feel like swimming back. Will you come pick me up?
[00:21:49] Speaker A: What?
That's. What a kick.
[00:21:53] Speaker C: Go pick time for kick. For sure this time.
[00:21:56] Speaker A: Go pick that guy up. There's a guy over there. We kind of know him.
[00:22:02] Speaker F: What?
[00:22:02] Speaker A: Oh, you pretend you're wearing the boots. I know it.
[00:22:08] Speaker F: You want me to swim out there.
[00:22:09] Speaker E: Roscoe, just swim.
[00:22:10] Speaker A: I want you to fly over there.
[00:22:15] Speaker F: Okay.
[00:22:16] Speaker G: He starts swimming, I'm gonna. Roscoe starts swimming, he'll bring the body back with him.
[00:22:24] Speaker C: All right. Kick meets you halfway.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: Yeah. Kick. Take this body back. See if Rafina can do anything. I think he's dead, but I don't know. Rafina's a better healer than me.
[00:22:38] Speaker F: Is he dead?
[00:22:40] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:22:42] Speaker F: Oh, all right. Yeah. Looks dead to me. All right, I'll swim. Swimming back.
I'm still swimming.
[00:22:53] Speaker C: Yep.
[00:22:53] Speaker F: It's kind of a long swim. I'm still swimming.
[00:22:55] Speaker G: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:22:56] Speaker F: It's kind of heavy, but I'm super buff. But I'm. But I'm in disguise.
[00:23:01] Speaker C: What are we. What is Batwack thinking of while he's swimming?
[00:23:06] Speaker F: Revising the signal.
[00:23:09] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
Oh, so good.
[00:23:17] Speaker E: Right there.
[00:23:19] Speaker G: Oh, so good.
[00:23:28] Speaker C: All right, so you get the body back to the island eyelet. Finally. And you all hear what's wrong?
[00:23:39] Speaker G: Oh, that makes me feel actually bad. This poor dusk queen.
[00:23:48] Speaker F: Nothing.
You looked for the signal and you saw it.
[00:23:57] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:24:00] Speaker F: You're very powerful.
[00:24:03] Speaker G: This is a Mice and man.
[00:24:04] Speaker C: Are you happy, King?
[00:24:10] Speaker A: My God.
[00:24:15] Speaker F: I.
I'm. I'm happy to know how strong you are.
[00:24:21] Speaker C: Good.
I'd run to the peninsula.
[00:24:31] Speaker F: Yes. Onward.
[00:24:35] Speaker G: Will, did you break her mouth?
[00:24:37] Speaker A: I guess so. Rafina's been throwing things down there.
[00:24:40] Speaker C: Yeah, that's true.
[00:24:41] Speaker G: Oh, yeah.
[00:24:42] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:24:43] Speaker G: I forgot.
[00:24:44] Speaker C: The central supporting tent pole in Will's tent is lodged down there. That's the problem.
Is the piano in there? Rafina, be honest.
[00:24:55] Speaker F: I'll drag this body up onto the island.
[00:24:58] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:25:03] Speaker A: Why do we have to have.
[00:25:04] Speaker F: Does Rafina care?
[00:25:05] Speaker E: You have to ask me about it?
[00:25:08] Speaker F: Well.
Hey, ruffian. I just brought you a Dead body?
[00:25:13] Speaker C: You've been playing this for how long? You don't know what kind of cleric Abby is.
She must be at least asked, if not pleaded, to deliver her medical services.
[00:25:26] Speaker F: I found this thing. What do you think we should do with it?
[00:25:31] Speaker E: You guys, I don't have enough.
I don't have all the resources I need to bring back to life.
Wait, more than one person?
[00:25:42] Speaker C: Oh, all right, yeah. Plus his boat's gone, so now then he'd be just on here with us.
[00:25:49] Speaker A: No, thank you. Also, again, he was going to be wildly unsuccessful in his life whether he lived or died.
[00:25:55] Speaker D: And he was.
[00:25:56] Speaker G: But this is our Walter White moment where we could have done a second medicine check on this guy. But you know what? Let's think about it. Never mind.
[00:26:06] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Who? Yeah, who does. Wait. Somebody. I didn't realize there were not two medicine checks. I'm not going to do it though.
[00:26:14] Speaker E: Oh, because you did it back? Because yours didn't work out.
[00:26:16] Speaker G: Well, I don't want to like meta game it too much, but Roscoe is no doctor.
[00:26:21] Speaker F: Well, I mean, I was sort of. That's kind of what I was asking when I was out in the water.
[00:26:25] Speaker C: Yeah, we were swimming. You can actually give me a medicine check now.
[00:26:28] Speaker F: All right.
I'm so good at medicine.
[00:26:33] Speaker C: Medicine. Turning ships into the sea when they are occupied by a slightly annoying guy.
[00:26:44] Speaker A: Wow. But that's just the price he paid.
[00:26:48] Speaker C: He paid it with a voucher. Hey.
Or maybe 21 of them.
[00:26:56] Speaker A: Wow. Or there might have been 22 of them.
[00:27:00] Speaker E: Are you writing my recap for me?
[00:27:02] Speaker C: Yeah, you.
Do you get it?
[00:27:07] Speaker E: No.
[00:27:07] Speaker A: Mr.
[00:27:07] Speaker C: Bright side, it's another killer song.
[00:27:10] Speaker E: Oh.
[00:27:11] Speaker G: Oh, I didn't get it either.
[00:27:13] Speaker A: Oh, man.
[00:27:13] Speaker F: Oh, I did.
[00:27:15] Speaker C: But he didn't say anything.
Oh, he did. Sorry. He rolled. I didn't recognize it cuz it was another single digit number.
It didn't register in my brain because it was another single digigit number. Yeah, he's dead.
[00:27:35] Speaker B: Oh my God.
I do feel kind of. Feel kind of bad about this.
What? What are we guys? Are we just.
Are we just a bunch of killers?
[00:27:51] Speaker D: Wait, this was accident.
[00:27:54] Speaker A: Yeah, it was.
[00:27:55] Speaker D: I know.
[00:27:55] Speaker C: Kill him.
[00:27:56] Speaker B: Believe us, they're gonna call us the Killers.
[00:28:02] Speaker E: I thought we were Shimmy and the Shim Shams.
[00:28:05] Speaker B: Now we're Shimmy and the Killers.
[00:28:11] Speaker C: All right, I can deal with that.
[00:28:14] Speaker D: We. But guys, we kill lots of people. This guy, we not kill.
[00:28:19] Speaker A: That's true.
[00:28:21] Speaker D: Mo feel bad about every death. He cause this.
[00:28:24] Speaker A: No, wait, you do?
[00:28:26] Speaker C: Oh, yeah.
[00:28:27] Speaker G: Oh, that's fascinating.
[00:28:29] Speaker A: You feel bad?
[00:28:31] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm not psychopath.
[00:28:34] Speaker G: Oh, that hurt.
[00:28:35] Speaker A: Will, that's so good. But you so enthusiastically bring about those deaths usually.
[00:28:41] Speaker D: Well, I mean, sometimes things have to die, but that does not mean.
[00:28:45] Speaker A: No.
[00:28:45] Speaker D: Not feel bad about them. Do you mean you, like, when you, like, you know, that one time that, like, we kill and eat deer?
[00:28:55] Speaker A: That's a deer.
[00:28:56] Speaker D: You not feel bad. No, wait, like, when we get fish and we cook the fish and eat the fish, you not that. Not upset any of you.
[00:29:08] Speaker A: Uh, oh, I read the room. Is. Is Mo going to be upset if we. Oh, is he getting upset?
[00:29:17] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:29:18] Speaker G: Oh, this is great.
[00:29:21] Speaker A: Well, Batwack's a vegetarian, and.
[00:29:25] Speaker D: Yeah, but he still killed, like, Beth. Are we calling him that now?
[00:29:29] Speaker A: Kick.
[00:29:30] Speaker D: Okay, Kick. You not feel bad when you kill someone?
[00:29:36] Speaker F: Well, sure. I mean, unless they're really bad.
[00:29:42] Speaker D: Hmm.
Interesting.
And Rafina, you. You thought you feel bad about killing person and street, and then you forget.
[00:29:55] Speaker E: Uh, oh, I forgot.
[00:29:56] Speaker D: See?
[00:30:01] Speaker E: Do you mean the person that I was absolved for too prematurely? Yeah, I didn't forget.
[00:30:09] Speaker D: You feel bad?
[00:30:10] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:30:11] Speaker D: Oh, okay. I did not know.
[00:30:14] Speaker E: But, Mo, I'm really fascinated by this because I want to know how you balance. Like, do you have a way. Do you have a ritual you do or something you say to help you process when you have to kill something and then feel bad about it?
[00:30:31] Speaker C: No.
[00:30:31] Speaker D: You just feel the bad?
[00:30:34] Speaker E: No, but. Yes, but is that all you do? Like, do you have a system?
[00:30:41] Speaker D: What?
[00:30:41] Speaker E: How do you know that you feel it enough or that you aren't feel that you're not. Not feeling it enough?
[00:30:45] Speaker D: I don't. No, you just feel it. Whatever you feel, you feel.
[00:30:51] Speaker E: For how long?
[00:30:52] Speaker D: I don't know. Why? What. What is this about?
[00:30:56] Speaker C: Wrong and.
[00:30:57] Speaker D: No, you just.
[00:30:58] Speaker E: I want to turn it. Turn this into some sort of healing.
[00:31:04] Speaker D: Oh, for you.
[00:31:06] Speaker C: You.
[00:31:06] Speaker E: Well, maybe for me, but for other people, too.
[00:31:09] Speaker D: You just, you. You know, like, it's just you feel the way you feel about it. It's not all the same.
[00:31:17] Speaker E: I know. I'm just. I'm gathering data.
[00:31:20] Speaker C: I'm sorry.
[00:31:21] Speaker D: I just confused. Maybe it's like something like we don't.
[00:31:26] Speaker C: Have Right word for.
[00:31:31] Speaker D: Roscoe. You feel bad when you kill things? People, animals, plants.
[00:31:40] Speaker B: I'm kind of a wild God.
[00:31:45] Speaker D: Okay, so, like, does that mean sometimes yes, sometimes no? Or does that mean, like, sometimes you think of a banana?
[00:32:00] Speaker B: Sometimes I feel good about bananas.
Sometimes I feel bad about killing.
[00:32:09] Speaker D: Do you ever feel good about killing?
[00:32:16] Speaker B: Well, I guess. I guess not, to be honest. But if I'm also Gonna be completely honest.
I think the bad feeling has kind of gotten weaker and weaker over the years.
[00:32:37] Speaker D: Why?
[00:32:40] Speaker B: It's a good question, Mo. Because right now I'm looking down at this Aces guy and.
[00:32:47] Speaker D: And you feel bad.
[00:32:48] Speaker G: I don't know.
[00:32:49] Speaker D: I confused.
Like, if you get weaker. Weaker. But then I not hear you ever say, well, maybe I have. It's been a long couple of days. But I can't remember you talking about someone dying like this. And lot of death are more direct from your hand.
[00:33:11] Speaker B: Yeah, Mo, what can I say? This. This probably should not have happened, but I also navigate this world with a distinct sense that most things that happen probably don't need to.
So, I don't know.
It can be hard to mustard up sympathy.
Did I say mustard?
[00:33:48] Speaker A: You have a really big gob of mustard. Right.
[00:33:51] Speaker G: What?
[00:33:52] Speaker A: Mustard.
[00:33:52] Speaker G: Right where?
[00:33:53] Speaker A: Right there.
[00:33:56] Speaker C: Yes, you do.
[00:33:56] Speaker B: I meant mustard.
[00:34:03] Speaker D: Okay, well, I think you.
I don't know what I think.
[00:34:12] Speaker C: And Mo walks away.
Yeah.
[00:34:16] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:34:21] Speaker C: Well, that was weird.
[00:34:24] Speaker E: I feel like a jerk.
[00:34:27] Speaker C: Why?
[00:34:30] Speaker E: Because Mo has better standards than any of us.
[00:34:34] Speaker C: I don't know.
[00:34:34] Speaker A: I don't know about that.
[00:34:37] Speaker C: He get. Did he say plants at some point? Yeah, like, feel bad about, like, stepping on grass.
[00:34:42] Speaker A: Tomato sandwich. Like, get over it, Mo.
[00:34:45] Speaker C: That's little.
The kick. Do you feel bad about.
Is that what you. What's my voice?
Do you feel bad? Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad. Do you feel bad about killing plants?
As close as I got right now, apparently.
[00:35:13] Speaker E: But who's he talking to?
[00:35:15] Speaker C: Kick.
[00:35:15] Speaker E: Who?
[00:35:16] Speaker F: Who? Where's.
No, I eat plants.
[00:35:24] Speaker B: Yeah, I can relate to him about that. I mean, you know, I. I don't like when, you know, weapons take down the natural world, like, in a general kind of sense.
And honestly, I. I don't know. I tried saving this guy from my snake. I tried very valiantly for an extended sequence there to try to keep this guy from being killed by my snake.
[00:35:49] Speaker G: You know, So I will say that. Mo. Mo. Okay.
[00:35:52] Speaker B: He's walking. I tell him that later. Just remind him of that later.
It is.
[00:36:02] Speaker G: It's tough. It's tough trying to roleplay Roscoe when it was really me as a player that was so cavalier about this character. And Roscoe's, like, feeling like. Yeah, I don't know why. I. I don't think I was cavalier, but something in me was.
[00:36:17] Speaker A: I think part of the weirdness here is that as a group, like, as a group, we were all there to witness it and now all have to process this. One guy's death versus most of the time, we Just individually kill people. And if that happens in a battle, then it happens in a battle.
[00:36:35] Speaker G: And it was. And it really was like a freak accident, you know? Like, it was completely.
Excuse me. It was weird and fucked up.
[00:36:48] Speaker A: I think we. It's like we're all seeing each other naked right now. Like, how are we reacting to this? And are we all not comfortable with our reactions? That's kind of how I feel right now. I don't know if anyone's looking at me, but. Stop looking.
[00:37:00] Speaker C: Sorry.
[00:37:00] Speaker E: A lot of Mo naked, but he hasn't seen a lot of us naked.
[00:37:04] Speaker A: That is true, Rafina.
[00:37:07] Speaker C: Maybe that's saying something.
[00:37:11] Speaker E: Who are you?
[00:37:12] Speaker C: She merely.
[00:37:13] Speaker A: Oh, oh.
Gonna kill us. Now I'm a little worried. That was what I. In that moment, I got a little nervous.
[00:37:20] Speaker E: Mo's not gonna kill us. At least he won't without feeling bad about it.
[00:37:23] Speaker A: Ah, that's true. But it doesn't mean he's gonna stop because he doesn't give a. In the heat of the moment.
[00:37:29] Speaker C: Maybe his moral or whatever it is is that he feels bad about killing everything else except us.
[00:37:35] Speaker A: Yeah, shimmy. I'm sure that's what it is.
[00:37:37] Speaker D: Probably she.
[00:37:40] Speaker A: Me? You've claimed to be a hedonist. Why don't you go around killing everybody? You just don't wanna.
[00:37:44] Speaker C: Oh, I mean, it wouldn't be very advantageous, would it?
[00:37:47] Speaker A: Okay, all right, well, we'll have to talk about that some other time. I've been meaning to talk to you about that anyway.
All right, well, should we just kick this guy into the ocean? Because this is not a desert island where we can bury something. He's just a guy.
[00:38:02] Speaker B: Well, let's make sure we get all of us, like, money faced. I mean, you know what they say. Mo money, mo problems.
[00:38:14] Speaker A: Mo is. Why would you say that?
Mo dove off the island five minutes ago.
He doesn't want to play with us anymore.
Yeah, sure, sure. I think you're severely lacking in gold. Right.
Why don't you raid that dead guy's pockets? There's probably some seaweed in there for you.
[00:38:42] Speaker B: Oh, you're being sarcastic. Yeah, I get it.
Well, yeah, we could just kick him into the water. Kick?
[00:38:53] Speaker E: We don't have to.
[00:38:54] Speaker B: Your name is Kick. So maybe you do it when we turn around.
[00:38:59] Speaker A: Our Reed. Thorin and Gnar just staring at him.
[00:39:02] Speaker F: Taking him over to the water.
Nobody's gonna resurrect him, right? He's.
[00:39:07] Speaker G: He's.
[00:39:07] Speaker F: He's just dead.
[00:39:08] Speaker C: I don't know. Are they?
[00:39:11] Speaker G: None of us tried cpr.
[00:39:13] Speaker A: Let me make out with him, see if I can revive him, because that's my kissy power now.
Nope, he's dead.
[00:39:22] Speaker G: Wait, what? Yeah, what is your kissy power?
[00:39:24] Speaker A: Shut up.
[00:39:25] Speaker C: Wait, what do I know about you? Kissy power?
[00:39:28] Speaker A: Nobody does. That's. He doesn't really say that out loud. I just think it's very funny. Like, how do I check? How do I check with my killer.
[00:39:35] Speaker F: Idea for a new signal?
[00:39:38] Speaker C: Oh, Will makes out with the giant.
[00:39:41] Speaker F: Exactly.
Exactly, Exactly.
[00:39:45] Speaker C: That's exactly.
[00:39:47] Speaker D: No.
[00:39:50] Speaker E: It would be unmistakable.
[00:39:56] Speaker A: My whole head could fit in there. I don't like it. It's like a guillotine, don't you think? Because she has teeth.
[00:40:05] Speaker C: Yeah. What if.
[00:40:06] Speaker A: The size of a head.
[00:40:07] Speaker C: What if that was the signal? What would that lighter have been like?
[00:40:09] Speaker A: Cut my head off? Is that the signal? Eat my head. That's the signal. Stuff my head down your mouth. That's the signal. Oh, okay, stop it.
Roscoe can do that. All right.
[00:40:21] Speaker C: Okay. All right. So you all have these philosophical discussions about grief and loss and death.
[00:40:29] Speaker F: Oh, wait, are you wrapping up? I have one more thing I wanted to do.
[00:40:32] Speaker C: Okay, so this. This narration starts up and then fades off as we zoom in to kick kneeling down directly in front of the mouth. Or.
[00:40:45] Speaker A: No, he whispers into the mouth. Hello. That's not how.
[00:40:51] Speaker C: Mouth everyone.
That would be my instinct, though. Hey, if I wanted to try to whisper to the dust pool.
[00:41:00] Speaker A: Say it right here.
Get out of here.
[00:41:05] Speaker F: Can you whistle?
[00:41:07] Speaker E: Disgusting. Can you whistle?
[00:41:11] Speaker F: I want to hear you whistle.
[00:41:12] Speaker C: Is this for real?
[00:41:13] Speaker F: I'm just kidding.
[00:41:14] Speaker C: Oh, okay. It's not for real.
Could be tonight.
[00:41:20] Speaker F: No, we need to change the signal.
[00:41:25] Speaker C: Oh, let's say that would seem to work.
[00:41:32] Speaker F: Well, I. I agree, but it's easy to mix up with other bright lights, so let's do this.
The light will blink. It'll blink. Two long blinks, three short blinks, and then the light will just stay on.
When you see that, Destroy everything.
[00:41:59] Speaker C: Too long, three short, then constant.
[00:42:08] Speaker F: Yes. And then everything around us.
All the ships can go.
[00:42:16] Speaker C: Yes, Lord.
[00:42:20] Speaker A: Whoa, whoa, Lord.
Get out of here, dust queen. Who are you calling lord? I don't even know what I didn't hear. Bathwack side of the conversation.
[00:42:31] Speaker F: She's probably. She's probably talking to you.
[00:42:33] Speaker A: I see. I look over there and see you whispering into her mouth.
[00:42:37] Speaker F: I'm not whispering.
[00:42:44] Speaker C: No, he swam down to the underwater drive in movie theater. Everyone knows that's the ear.
[00:42:52] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:42:53] Speaker E: Not the helipad.
[00:42:54] Speaker A: Amazing.
[00:42:55] Speaker C: No, clearly.
[00:42:55] Speaker F: Oh, you guys, we can totally breathe Underwater. We should go watch a movie.
[00:42:58] Speaker E: We could, right?
[00:42:59] Speaker A: Yeah, let's do it.
So that's how we spend the rest of the trip.
[00:43:04] Speaker F: Meanwhile, I'll. I'll give the shopkeeper a burial at sea. Then if Rafina is not going to.
[00:43:11] Speaker E: Resurrect him, why do you keep putting it on me?
[00:43:14] Speaker F: You have the diamond.
[00:43:16] Speaker E: I'm not resurrecting this shopkeeper.
[00:43:18] Speaker F: Every single person who dies, we bring them to you, and you decide whether they live or Bathwack.
[00:43:23] Speaker A: I love this, though. Okay, can I say, this is something that I specifically. It sucks because it's. Now, I know it's late. Maybe we can keep this for the next time. But, like, I have wondered. There have been many times that it does seem like the last time it happened was in Trent, when Bathwick was like, we gotta fix this. And Rafina was like, yeah, I know. And then, like, everything, you know, weeks went by in between, and we didn't really address it until later. But, like, if Bathwack thinks that every life should be saved, I think that's an important thing for your character to say. Or for you to say. Like, maybe even if you just say right now. Like, if it's that important to him. Like, that's an interesting thing, because I think this moment was really interesting. Again, I think Rafina is different than what Will originally thought Rafina is.
[00:44:08] Speaker F: And I think all that I could say is that, you know, you can use the diamond.
You can use it.
[00:44:17] Speaker E: I'm still afraid I'm going to need to resurrect you.
[00:44:23] Speaker F: Nah, I'm not gonna die.
[00:44:27] Speaker E: This is a special diamond.
[00:44:30] Speaker F: Besides, the Dust Queen is gonna destroy everything.
We're invincible as long as we're here.
[00:44:41] Speaker E: Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm being stingy with this diamond.
[00:44:44] Speaker F: We can always get another one.
It's just a diamond.
[00:44:51] Speaker E: Is the guy bobbing away already?
[00:44:53] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Can I hear any of that, too?
[00:44:55] Speaker C: I don't know.
[00:44:55] Speaker F: I'm right. I'm right down at the edge of the.
[00:44:56] Speaker C: I don't think he would have chucked him in before this conversation.
[00:45:01] Speaker F: I'll be like, 1, 2, 3, splash. Hey, Rafina.
[00:45:09] Speaker A: Like, I think. Yeah, I don't think. It sounded like we were just not really caring about this death, so I guess I don't even hear this. I am somewhere else, probably. I'm just. Bathwhack's gonna throw the gross dead bod.
[00:45:18] Speaker C: In the water far away. It's. Whatever. You're probably not all venturing out onto the sclera Much sclera.
[00:45:24] Speaker A: But there's a rim around the sclera, so.
[00:45:26] Speaker C: Yeah, there is a scleral rim.
[00:45:28] Speaker A: I just like that. I also like the image of Rafina just kind of. Or bathwack or. I guess it's Rafina approaching bathwack. If Bathwack was about to.
[00:45:35] Speaker C: Well, no, he said he. Before he would do it. He was.
[00:45:38] Speaker A: Oh, before. No, I'm saying if he was about.
[00:45:40] Speaker C: So you could use the diamond.
[00:45:42] Speaker A: Right? That's what I'm saying. Like, if Bathwack was standing at the edge of the water and having this difficult kind of situation in his head, then Rafina could.
[00:45:51] Speaker F: I'm gonna also add, Rafina, as long as you're alive, we're all fine.
[00:45:57] Speaker E: That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
[00:45:59] Speaker F: You can always get another diamond.
[00:46:04] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:46:07] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Oh.
[00:46:11] Speaker E: I think you're right.
[00:46:12] Speaker A: No.
[00:46:16] Speaker C: And she throws the diamond into the ocean.
[00:46:19] Speaker A: Titanic.
[00:46:21] Speaker F: Like, it'll be there when we need it.
[00:46:23] Speaker A: Titanic. Amazing.
[00:46:26] Speaker E: Oh, my God. She's an old lady.
[00:46:28] Speaker G: Oh, my God.
[00:46:31] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:46:35] Speaker F: My God.
[00:46:37] Speaker C: I'm sorry. That didn't happen.
But what does happen?
[00:46:46] Speaker E: Rafina is pensive.
That's what happens.
[00:46:52] Speaker F: Kick is just gonna sit down and drag his feet in the water.
[00:46:58] Speaker E: You.
[00:46:58] Speaker F: Know, wait and see if you resurrect this guy. If not, I'm chucking him in the water, you guys.
[00:47:02] Speaker C: The rest of you can see them by this body, just sitting by the edge. Just so you know. Maybe. Would look a little weird, I think.
[00:47:09] Speaker A: I think they're just being sappy, sappy sacks of shit. Okay, good. Good job, guys. Have a funeral for this idiot. If only he was nice and went over and talked, he'd be like, no, we need that diamond. Rafine is right.
[00:47:20] Speaker E: Be stingy cake. Do you really want me to resurrect this guy?
[00:47:28] Speaker F: I mean, he was kind of annoying, but he didn't deserve to die.
[00:47:36] Speaker E: No. And, I mean, we were very involved in his death in indirect ways, but also, we weren't.
[00:47:43] Speaker F: It was an accident.
[00:47:44] Speaker E: It was an accident.
All right. I'm gonna.
I'm gonna say a prayer and figure out what I need to do. That's all I need to do. So you stay here. Just wait.
And rafina walks about 10 paces away.
[00:48:01] Speaker F: You hear loud splashing noises.
[00:48:03] Speaker E: Yeah.
And you hear silence.
You hear.
And then she rolls a D100O, guys.
[00:48:25] Speaker C: By the way, that's. That singing is from Abby's Real religion. I don't think that's not on the wiki, but it's true. So if you laugh at that, you're bad person.
[00:48:38] Speaker F: Fortunately for you, her rear religion has no hell, so there's not much she can do about it.
[00:48:45] Speaker E: However, she won't bring you back from the dead.
[00:48:47] Speaker A: Yeah, that's dang sure.
[00:48:51] Speaker E: All right, so with this D100, Eric, what should it be?
[00:48:56] Speaker C: What should what be? I'm not sure what you're doing with.
[00:48:58] Speaker A: Making a decision rather to resurrect or not.
[00:49:01] Speaker E: She's making a decision.
[00:49:02] Speaker C: Okay, well, how much before this conversation happened, how much did Rafina want to resurrect this guy? Like, what percentage of.
We're doing, like, wavelength right now.
[00:49:18] Speaker E: Rapina's mindset was definitely one of not feeling very entangled with this person's fate and not.
And worry. It's. She's still, like, in.
What's it called when you're, like, really in high alert around the situation? Because we've talked so much around Bathwack pretending to be dead and might actually be dead and do we, you know, raise him from the dead? What if it doesn't work very well and it's an ordeal to raise someone from the dead? It's an ordeal for the person. Like, she's still really activated by all this and. And feels the responsibility very heavily. So.
[00:50:02] Speaker C: So where's the red arrows? It's, like, slammed to the left in that instance. Or is it, like, kind of.
[00:50:08] Speaker E: And what is the left doesn't want to.
[00:50:10] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:50:12] Speaker C: Like, far right is must revive or whatever.
[00:50:16] Speaker E: Well, certainly not must, and it's certainly not like, I hate this person, and this person should not be on the earth.
The problem is that it falls onto her is, like, making a decision about whether or not he lives or dies.
[00:50:31] Speaker G: You're praying for guidance right now? Yeah, I mean, like. Like, divine intervention works with a D100, and if the cast. And if the person rolls a number equal to or lower than their cleric level, then the deity intervenes.
[00:50:50] Speaker E: Wow.
[00:50:50] Speaker G: So this isn't quite divine intervention. You're not casting divine intervention, but, like, it's a similar mechanic.
[00:50:55] Speaker E: Yes. What I'm looking for is a mechanic to help me.
[00:50:58] Speaker G: And what's your cleric level?
[00:51:02] Speaker E: It is.
[00:51:03] Speaker F: I. But I feel like Roscoe's snake staff should, like, get out. And you'll mistake the snake visiting, like, crawling across your lap as.
[00:51:12] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:51:12] Speaker F: As a sign.
[00:51:14] Speaker A: Then the snake will eat the diamond.
[00:51:17] Speaker C: Oh, hello, King Worm.
[00:51:22] Speaker A: And it will eat the guy. And we'll be like, well, that solves that.
[00:51:27] Speaker E: So I'm Cleric Level 12.
[00:51:31] Speaker G: Yeah. I mean, I. I know that's just the ancestor jet.
[00:51:34] Speaker E: That's helpful. I appreciate that, but we don't know how they'll intervene.
[00:51:41] Speaker G: Well, but again, this is. That's just a mechanic. Like.
[00:51:45] Speaker E: Yeah, yeah, we could say that you.
[00:51:46] Speaker G: Roll a D100, and on this. Within this range, you're like.
[00:51:52] Speaker C: Well, the 12, I think, is. How about that? 12 is a good range. And I'm just gonna say that, like, 12 or lower. Well, yeah, but I'm gonna put a custom range, like, to match. I don't know why I'm doing this. Doesn't matter. To, like, match where you are on the spectrum of whether you want to. You feel like you must or must not resuscitate where that scale is 1 to 100. So, like, are you, like, 50. 50 right now, Rafina, are you leaning more towards doing it or not, or.
[00:52:23] Speaker E: She's feeling more open to the idea of being influenced by bathwack's preference.
[00:52:27] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:52:28] Speaker E: And since Bathwack is not that, you know, pushy about it, she's. She's gonna go. She's gonna go ask for divine intervention.
[00:52:36] Speaker C: Okay.
So I'm gonna say, like, if you roll within six either way of 60.
[00:52:45] Speaker E: 60.
[00:52:46] Speaker C: Yeah. So anywhere from 54 to 66.
[00:52:51] Speaker E: All right.
I like it. Here we go.
[00:52:57] Speaker G: Holy.
[00:52:58] Speaker E: No.
[00:52:58] Speaker G: That's so close.
[00:52:59] Speaker A: What the.
[00:53:00] Speaker E: Holy crap.
67.
[00:53:04] Speaker C: 67.
[00:53:09] Speaker A: Gotta be interesting.
[00:53:12] Speaker C: Your ululations carry across the bay. Everybody is quieted and has turned towards Rafina.
Go on.
[00:53:24] Speaker E: I notice a swastika tattoo on his arm.
[00:53:35] Speaker G: Oh, my God.
[00:53:38] Speaker A: Did we say whatever guy in the water?
[00:53:41] Speaker E: I said. I said dnr.
[00:53:45] Speaker G: The guy in Trent. It was like, retroactive. Like trans. Terminal illness. Like, he must have had this. This is retroactive Nazism. He was probably a supremacist.
[00:53:56] Speaker A: Oh, my God. Oh, geez.
[00:54:00] Speaker G: 67 on a range of.
[00:54:03] Speaker A: That was such a small range. That's so weird. What does that mean? I hope you got something good. Take a second. I'm squeezing that thigh.
[00:54:10] Speaker C: Yeah, now you're slapping it.
[00:54:12] Speaker A: Slapping it.
[00:54:13] Speaker G: That's not as th thigh.
[00:54:15] Speaker A: It's my.
[00:54:16] Speaker C: It's my other thigh.
[00:54:18] Speaker G: It's his.
[00:54:21] Speaker A: It's not his thigh.
[00:54:23] Speaker C: It's his other.
Oh, my God.
Your u lat have carried across the bay, and everybody is sort of turned and focused on you. Are you. Do you, like. Is Rafina there? Like, eyes closed, wide open, like, looking up, looking down? Like, what's your posture?
[00:54:49] Speaker E: Well, she's doing a little bit of a slow spin with unfocused eyes to sort of take in all the signals that could be Offered to her.
[00:55:00] Speaker C: Got it.
[00:55:02] Speaker A: I love that.
[00:55:07] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:55:11] Speaker E: She trips and falls.
[00:55:14] Speaker A: She gets dizzy. Whoa. I'm used to spinning much faster than that.
[00:55:23] Speaker C: Yeah. And you're you. So you spin around slowly. No visions appear, and you come to a slow stop and are just staring out over the bay.
The intentionality of all of this makes you all think that Rafina's looking at something. So you kind of turn and look where she was looking. Maybe like something across on the shore or something. And the listener can see. But none of you can see that right behind Rafina, pouring out of seemingly nothing, is this silent, shimmering, rose red waterfall pouring down behind her.
[00:56:14] Speaker E: Wait, does she see it?
[00:56:16] Speaker C: No, it's behind you. Nobody sees it.
[00:56:21] Speaker A: Wait, we don't see it. I thought we were looking at it.
[00:56:23] Speaker E: You're looking.
[00:56:23] Speaker C: We're looking where she's looking.
[00:56:25] Speaker G: She's looking.
[00:56:26] Speaker A: Oh, that's right. Right. Okay. Okay. Okay.
[00:56:28] Speaker E: Oh.
[00:56:30] Speaker C: The top of the waterfall sort of like, separates into this. It splits up into, like, four even segments that start to bend downward in these graceful arcs of water, seemingly defying physics.
And then the waterfall just slowly fades away to nothing.
[00:57:02] Speaker E: And no one is seeing it.
[00:57:03] Speaker G: And she just.
[00:57:04] Speaker C: And nobody saw it. And we'll find out what happens next time on Pork Fried Dice.
[00:57:12] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:57:13] Speaker G: That's so good.
[00:57:15] Speaker A: Wow.
[00:57:16] Speaker E: Nobody sees it, Eric.
[00:57:18] Speaker G: I really liked that.
[00:57:19] Speaker D: Thanks.
[00:57:20] Speaker A: You should never be nervous.
[00:57:22] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:57:23] Speaker G: No, that was. That was.
[00:57:25] Speaker A: Except for when you're a guy that's talking to me and you're being stupid.
[00:57:29] Speaker C: Oh.
[00:57:30] Speaker A: Because I want to kill that guy. So does Adam. Watch out.
And now he's dead, so I guess he's died.
[00:57:38] Speaker G: What a weird session.
[00:57:40] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:57:40] Speaker G: Was a combination of perhaps the most manically silly, delightful stuff. And then immediately I felt punished for having fun.
[00:57:52] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:57:59] Speaker G: And then it brought. It led to some really interesting mo Stuff and grafina and. And bathwack. Like, it's really good.
[00:58:08] Speaker C: Plus, hey, free lighter, us pay.
[00:58:12] Speaker G: Free lighter.
[00:58:12] Speaker A: Flamethrower. Torch.
[00:58:14] Speaker E: Flamethrower. Exactly.
[00:58:16] Speaker A: Like, something going on there. Wow.
[00:58:19] Speaker E: There's some. Something wild about, like, the dynamic between Alex and me that was really encapsulated in that discussion where. Where, like, even though I'm, like, the adamant person about things that are obviously right, to me, there's so many times when he's just like, well, why aren't you just, you know, following your values here?
Yeah.
[00:58:50] Speaker G: Interesting.
[00:58:51] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:58:52] Speaker A: I love it. I love that there's a struggle and that also, I love that Rafina takes the diamond seriously because. Yeah. Have we encountered a lot of diamonds? Who knows?
[00:59:00] Speaker E: Right.
[00:59:01] Speaker A: Yeah. I. Yeah. Who knows? That's.
[00:59:04] Speaker E: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:59:05] Speaker A: Maybe we'll. We'll never get another diamond. I'm sure Eric will make it so that we can never get another.
[00:59:11] Speaker E: Probably.
[00:59:12] Speaker C: You know me.
[00:59:13] Speaker E: We're gonna be mad at you, Eric. We always are.
Just kidding.
[00:59:18] Speaker G: That's 67, though. Come on, guys.
[00:59:20] Speaker A: That was weird.
[00:59:22] Speaker G: I love D and D and I know that, like, just as often.
[00:59:25] Speaker C: That's way better. Like for your character, but no but for. For the narrative. That's the best. Like one of the best roles you could have made.
[00:59:34] Speaker G: Yeah, exactly.
[00:59:35] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:59:36] Speaker G: It truly was. A67 is so much more interesting.
[00:59:38] Speaker C: Way better than a65 would have been.
[00:59:40] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:59:41] Speaker C: So much better.
[00:59:42] Speaker E: Or than a 80. I mean, right?
[00:59:45] Speaker G: Any. God, that's crazy. Yeah, that's awesome.
[00:59:49] Speaker E: That's so wild.
[00:59:53] Speaker C: Hey, everyone, if you like what you hear, please leave us a kind review wherever you listen to us. Also, consider supporting us by subscribing to us on ko
[email protected] supportpfd where you can gain access to lots of exclusive treats and behind the scenes goodies. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time.
This should be a Patreon tier where we somehow record the books being written and the. The. These things that happen because I'm not even aware of them.
[01:00:26] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:00:26] Speaker C: And then they would have access to not only our player notes, but the.
The live. Who would ever watch that?
Somebody who pays $1 million, $1,000 a month tier.
[01:00:41] Speaker E: You get this feature. I think a tier should just be hook up with Eric.
[01:00:44] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:00:45] Speaker A: But also.
[01:00:45] Speaker C: Yeah.
[01:00:45] Speaker A: If you have $3 billion out there.
Hook up with Eric.
[01:00:49] Speaker E: Yeah.
[01:00:50] Speaker A: I retire. Right.
[01:00:51] Speaker G: You make what, like a tier on Patreon that's just like $3 million.
[01:00:55] Speaker A: Like sleep with Eric.
[01:00:57] Speaker G: One rewards.
[01:01:01] Speaker C: It's a voucher. It's really good.
[01:01:06] Speaker E: Those vouchers. We knew they'd come in handy.
[01:01:08] Speaker G: Oh, my God.
[01:01:09] Speaker A: That was great. And then it didn't matter.
Oh, well, it was so good.
[01:01:16] Speaker C: That poor guy got some walloping bolts out of him.
[01:01:19] Speaker A: We did. And we got a fight or something.
[01:01:22] Speaker G: We better get that club.
[01:01:25] Speaker E: You better go find it.
[01:01:27] Speaker A: I know. It could be floating. I guess it's.
[01:01:29] Speaker G: The main reason I wanted him to die was just so we could get stuff.
[01:01:33] Speaker A: 3,500 for a club.
[01:01:36] Speaker E: There's like no way travels around with all that expensive stuff. Stuff without any protection.
[01:01:43] Speaker A: Yeah. He just got smashed and. Oh, well, that was it.
[01:01:46] Speaker G: And he was getting really philosophical there at the end too. Like he was like, starting to question the underpinnings of, like, capitalism and the very meaning of trade and ownership.
[01:01:57] Speaker E: He must have had. I think he must have known almost the end. Yeah.
[01:02:01] Speaker G: And I think he was at peace at the end. You know, I think he was ready.
[01:02:05] Speaker E: Also, I think he had cancer and was a Nazi.
[01:02:11] Speaker A: We are so terrible, terrible.
[01:02:16] Speaker G: We're talking about dead Nazis. That's a good thing.
[01:02:19] Speaker A: Oh, you're right. I forgot. I'm the bad guy for saying that. For sure.
Amazing.
