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Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: You're listening to the show about Will having diarrhea.
It's pork fried dice.
I'm Eric, and I'm the dungeon master.
[00:00:12] Speaker B: I'm Abby, and I play Rufina.
[00:00:15] Speaker C: I'm Alex and I play bapwhack.
[00:00:18] Speaker D: I'm KT and I play will.
[00:00:22] Speaker E: I'm Adam and I play Roscoe.
[00:00:27] Speaker A: Hold on to your haversacks. Let's roll.
[00:00:35] Speaker D: Okay, here we go.
[00:00:36] Speaker B: Last night while I was sleeping, I woke up because I accidentally dragged my fidbit across my nose, and it pulled my nose ring out. And then I had to put my.
[00:00:44] Speaker D: Nose ring back in.
[00:00:45] Speaker B: In the.
[00:00:46] Speaker A: Did that register as a specific fitness event on your fitbit?
[00:00:54] Speaker B: That is the right question. I'm sorry.
[00:00:56] Speaker C: Yeah. Did you get a badge for that?
[00:00:58] Speaker D: I better.
[00:00:59] Speaker C: Man, you dragged your nose ring from earth to Mars.
[00:01:02] Speaker B: It was like a fever dream, but it all worked out, I think, because I woke up and my nose ring was definitely in.
[00:01:12] Speaker A: The morning.
[00:01:12] Speaker B: I mean, it was crazy, but now I know I can do it in the dark when I'm half asleep.
[00:01:18] Speaker D: Phew. Yeah. That means that you're used to it. Cause that's definitely, like, the next step of having a nose ring.
[00:01:26] Speaker B: I can't.
[00:01:26] Speaker A: Adam, are you gonna get a nose ring?
[00:01:28] Speaker B: I pulled it out.
[00:01:30] Speaker E: I don't think so.
[00:01:31] Speaker D: No.
[00:01:32] Speaker A: Maybe, though.
[00:01:32] Speaker B: Let us know when you're sure.
[00:01:34] Speaker A: Like, you might be getting.
[00:01:36] Speaker D: If Adam was gonna get a piercing, though, what would it be? We can ask Adam what it is, but also we can all judge.
[00:01:41] Speaker A: We don't know.
[00:01:42] Speaker D: He doesn't have. Tell him what he asks.
[00:01:43] Speaker C: It doesn't even have to be a piercing, really. Just. Are you gonna put any more holes in your body?
[00:01:47] Speaker D: Oh.
[00:01:48] Speaker C: Or close any ones that are already there?
[00:01:51] Speaker D: Yeah. How do. Yeah. Yeah.
[00:01:53] Speaker C: You don't like that question at all. I can tell from the look at his face.
[00:01:56] Speaker E: Well, I found a pimple under my beard.
[00:01:59] Speaker B: Oh, that's what that face is?
[00:02:01] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:02:02] Speaker E: I don't like it.
[00:02:03] Speaker B: Don't put a hole there.
[00:02:04] Speaker A: Well, you could. That would solve the problem.
[00:02:07] Speaker B: It would release the pressure.
[00:02:09] Speaker A: Just put a piercing right there. No more pimple.
[00:02:11] Speaker D: Pimple piercing.
[00:02:12] Speaker B: I can see Adam with one of those.
One of the things goes through the middle there.
[00:02:18] Speaker D: Which one? What's the middle? Oh, that's a septum piercing, right? Yeah, it's this.
[00:02:23] Speaker B: That's what they call it?
[00:02:24] Speaker D: Yeah, I think so.
[00:02:27] Speaker A: You can do that.
[00:02:28] Speaker D: Adam should get, like, a lip ring and do this. Ooh.
[00:02:34] Speaker A: You should get those. What are the ones? It's like something. Teeth.
[00:02:37] Speaker D: Oh, snake. It's like snake bite or something.
[00:02:39] Speaker A: Bite?
[00:02:40] Speaker D: Maybe.
[00:02:41] Speaker B: Wait, what is that?
[00:02:42] Speaker A: It's like a piercing.
[00:02:46] Speaker B: Oh, okay. Gotcha.
[00:02:47] Speaker D: Yeah, that's.
[00:02:48] Speaker B: That's fun.
[00:02:49] Speaker D: He still isn't weighed in, but you.
[00:02:51] Speaker B: Can'T see it with his beard.
[00:02:54] Speaker A: Well, you could get like a. He could get like a dangly thing, maybe.
[00:02:58] Speaker D: Maybe?
[00:02:58] Speaker B: Yeah, like a peacock chain in between.
[00:03:01] Speaker D: Peacock.
[00:03:02] Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. That's fantastic.
[00:03:05] Speaker E: What's up?
[00:03:07] Speaker D: Do you say with salt? With salt?
[00:03:10] Speaker A: Pretty much. And then zoomed in on himself. Salt?
[00:03:15] Speaker D: Wow.
Maybe he's already pierced. That's why he's not weighing it.
[00:03:23] Speaker A: That's what I said. We don't know that he's not pierced.
[00:03:25] Speaker D: Secret place.
[00:03:28] Speaker E: I, um.
I guess I just.
[00:03:32] Speaker A: Do you have your weenus pierced?
[00:03:37] Speaker B: Is that a particular location?
[00:03:39] Speaker E: I don't. I don't feel. I don't feel drawn to get a really piercing. I feel I definitely want. Like I should get a tattoo, but I don't. I mean, I guess if I get.
[00:03:51] Speaker A: A piercing, just like why should you get a tattoo?
[00:03:54] Speaker D: Because they're cool. Eric, I want one too.
[00:03:56] Speaker A: Like Eric doesn't want. That's like a word of obligation.
No, not like.
[00:04:01] Speaker E: Like I.
When I think about myself with a tattoo, that. That like, causes good feelings. Yeah, but I think about myself. I can't identify a place. But if I got a piercing and could wear like, like rings or something, like, I can't identify a place where that would actually, like, cause me like any kind of thrill or like, feeling.
[00:04:24] Speaker A: How about your Achilles tendon?
[00:04:27] Speaker E: Well, that always has been my weakness.
[00:04:31] Speaker A: Achilles tendon piercings. I know Jerome had three of them.
[00:04:37] Speaker D: Oh my gosh.
[00:04:39] Speaker A: It's his weakness.
[00:04:41] Speaker B: He had three Achilles tendons piercings.
[00:04:45] Speaker D: Achilles tendon piercings.
[00:04:47] Speaker A: Three in each foot, of course.
[00:04:50] Speaker D: Of course.
[00:04:52] Speaker A: Should we do this?
[00:04:53] Speaker B: Wait, are we playing?
[00:04:54] Speaker D: Should we?
[00:04:55] Speaker B: Oh, I hope I'm not the one who was supposed to write a recap.
[00:04:58] Speaker D: Nope, it was me.
All right, let's see.
[00:05:05] Speaker E: What do we got here?
[00:05:09] Speaker B: There's that good old sound.
[00:05:14] Speaker A: Previously on Pork Fried Dice.
[00:05:19] Speaker F: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. A waterfall tattoo.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
A socializing breakthrough.
Ra ra ra ra ra ra ra ra.
[00:05:42] Speaker D: Clock faces.
[00:05:43] Speaker F: Vocab expands. Ra ra ra ra ra ra.
What a crazy happenstance. Yargert. Goes to speak to old Rondell to get a carryout pint as well as discuss falls, falls, falls, falls. That's waterfalls.
When Rondell gives clock face's shoulder a pat from his slackened jaw a message is fat. Thou demons, leap.
Leap, leap, leap. Thou demons, leap.
Step carefully at demon sleep, claims the old barkeep. The peaks are what are what they seem.
And suddenly our wee mechanical friend can say a strange nonsense word. Ra, ra, ra. When batplex tells will about what happened, we'll suspicious of what the old man heard. No. Oh, no. Oh, no. Rondell knows a about our plans. But no, no, no.
Detect thoughts is a helpful scan.
Na, na, na. This barkeet grandpa doesn't know our plant at all. Must have been a weird trance. At this point, Batwhack needs to ask Bernard if he will risk his life and go real far to see save his world.
His wife, wife, wife. And little girl.
Will is terrified his brother may die.
Gives Bernard something for he says goodbye. His stone of luck.
Luck, luck, luck.
[00:07:40] Speaker D: Also a hug.
[00:07:45] Speaker F: Now its beds aplenty in kept by Branley.
[00:07:49] Speaker D: We each get a room. A room for free.
[00:07:53] Speaker F: Roscoe is sitting in a chair by the fire, humming a nice melody.
[00:08:00] Speaker D: Oi, oi, oi, oi, oi.
[00:08:01] Speaker F: That's wako shopping. Cause he needs supplies to make a symbol that's holy bones.
Bones.
Ruffina's terrarium's clean bones.
She makes a cemetery cob. Cob. Cabs will go to case the spot.
[00:08:29] Speaker D: Rolls, rolls.
[00:08:30] Speaker F: Arcana after a first glance. No cobs. No, no cobs. Their granite thingamabobs. Gathering info was a floppy. We learn nothing in advance. Tears, tears. Sorrow.
[00:08:43] Speaker D: 80.
[00:08:43] Speaker F: Sounds like someone's heart's breaking. Mustard in his eyes. Maybe Roscoe's crying like a baby. What? What? This is crazy. Here comes a compassionate lady. Rufina's on her way to save thee. Roscoe relates a circus memory.
Hold me closer, Tanya dance.
How about this choreography?
Trying with manly ways to impress her, but every time, she just ignored me.
Hold me closer, Tanya dancer.
Laugh as I stumble on the stage.
When our spotlights join together, laughter and tears combine to pure grace.
Ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra, ra. Rafina. She does a tap dance.
[00:10:19] Speaker D: I, at first, was gonna, like, the Tanya dancer thing came to me very quickly, but I couldn't, like, figure out how to do the rest of that song, and I was like, no, no, this is literally. That would just be Roscoe's part. Like, Tanya dancer, of course.
[00:10:32] Speaker E: Awesome.
[00:10:35] Speaker D: But then I like going back because Rafina tap danced in response.
[00:10:39] Speaker B: She's a great ending.
[00:10:45] Speaker E: That's so good.
[00:10:48] Speaker D: All right.
[00:10:49] Speaker B: That was quite the effective recap.
[00:10:51] Speaker D: I think it was pretty detailed. But also, like, I feel like our biggest problem is just remembering our plan. So hopefully we remember the plan.
[00:10:59] Speaker A: You and I should come up with a detailed task so that we could say it right now.
[00:11:02] Speaker D: We should say it. And then I forgot to do that.
[00:11:05] Speaker F: Haha.
[00:11:07] Speaker A: So we can. We can do it off the cuff.
[00:11:10] Speaker D: Oh, God.
That's not gonna be helpful. I mean, yeah, the plan is that bathwack and Rafina and. And Roscoe and Shemi and Mo shimi dressed as Valencia bass.
[00:11:25] Speaker E: Oh, there we go.
[00:11:27] Speaker D: Huh?
[00:11:28] Speaker A: Where do we go?
[00:11:29] Speaker B: Did you lose me?
[00:11:30] Speaker C: I think I just. Everyone keeps dropping out, but.
[00:11:34] Speaker D: Yeah. What was the saying? So we're going into plan. Going into an inner bar.
[00:11:39] Speaker A: You named all the players and NPC's except for Will, myself, and.
[00:11:43] Speaker D: Yeah, I go out of the town and come in, and so they are.
[00:11:46] Speaker A: They went to the ale house.
[00:11:49] Speaker D: Gonna die.
[00:11:50] Speaker A: That happened at the end. They went to the ale house.
[00:11:52] Speaker D: They went to the ale house, except for Will.
[00:11:54] Speaker A: Okay, to ostensibly order breakfast.
[00:11:57] Speaker D: And they're gonna. We're gonna start a fight or something, and.
And we're going to antagonize. Or I will antagonize the town or something, and Bathwater will defend the town and be a hero.
[00:12:12] Speaker E: A lot of poor somethings in this thorough recap.
[00:12:17] Speaker D: Yeah, it would have required listening to, like, three sessions worth of material.
So much.
That's why I was worried, because I'm like, we just. We have had a lot of ideas, but I'm worried we might not remember all the ideas, but there's a start.
[00:12:35] Speaker A: I'm gonna be separating all of you, so you'll all have to remember separately what the plan is.
[00:12:40] Speaker D: Demons leap and Bathwalk dies. And there's bones that are going to be his bones. And Rufina has those bones because will cast creation to make those bones. And he also disguised Chami as Valencia.
And Bathwack has the mask of whatever tragedy mask guy gang, so he can change his appearance.
[00:13:02] Speaker A: Mask of disguise.
[00:13:03] Speaker D: Mask of disguise.
[00:13:04] Speaker C: Oh, yeah.
[00:13:05] Speaker B: Wait, does anyone remember?
[00:13:06] Speaker C: Why did I put them in the terrarium?
[00:13:09] Speaker D: I don't know, but they're for you. Like, they're for you to. You know, because you're the one that's going to be like, oh, these are definitely bath wax.
[00:13:16] Speaker A: They're in your teapot somehow.
[00:13:18] Speaker D: Yeah, I remember.
[00:13:22] Speaker B: I wanted to build a graveyard in the tent.
[00:13:24] Speaker E: Definitely bathwax modes.
[00:13:29] Speaker D: Oh, this plan is perfect.
[00:13:33] Speaker E: All right, I think we could probably just flash. We should probably skip forward after the plan.
[00:13:39] Speaker D: Yeah. And we did it all correctly.
[00:13:42] Speaker A: Or we could skip back and you guys could plan some more.
[00:13:46] Speaker D: That's what we need for sure.
But I think that's all where everybody is, right?
[00:13:52] Speaker A: Correct.
[00:13:52] Speaker D: I think I remembered at least that. Mm hmm.
And. And I recapped everything else. What do you want?
[00:14:00] Speaker A: No, I'm just making sure.
[00:14:02] Speaker C: But, will, I spent 180 gold pieces in town.
[00:14:10] Speaker A: You did?
[00:14:11] Speaker C: Of your money?
[00:14:12] Speaker D: Yeah. How do you. What? When did you come up with that?
[00:14:16] Speaker A: Didn't you guys realize that you guys have coupons?
[00:14:19] Speaker D: We do have coupons. We do.
[00:14:21] Speaker E: Yeah, we had vouchers.
[00:14:22] Speaker C: We have 180 gold pieces worth of vouchers.
[00:14:25] Speaker A: They are. They are on. They're unfair.
[00:14:29] Speaker D: Eric really is just like, this town loves you guys.
Like every. They will.
[00:14:35] Speaker C: They won't soon.
[00:14:36] Speaker D: Yeah, but is there.
[00:14:39] Speaker E: Is there a fun reason for Bathwatch to confront Will about being reimbursed for gold? Yeah, because maybe you didn't use the vouchers, and that is great.
[00:14:56] Speaker D: I want to know what you got.
[00:14:57] Speaker C: I'll store credit. I told them that will Pompeon would be by to pay it.
[00:15:02] Speaker D: He doesn't exist in this town. It's Fred Greenman. No, it's Valencia Beigeman. There we go. Forgot which name.
[00:15:10] Speaker E: Guys, will you keep playing d and d while I listen, and I'll be right back?
[00:15:15] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:15:16] Speaker E: Thank you.
[00:15:18] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:15:19] Speaker A: All right, so Roscoe is dangling off of the edge of a cliff. What do you all do?
[00:15:25] Speaker C: I dropped my small silver mirror to help him climb up here, put this in one hand, and then I put some holy water in his other hand.
[00:15:33] Speaker A: The material components.
[00:15:35] Speaker D: Oh, these are all the material components. Holy.
[00:15:38] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:39] Speaker D: That's a lot of money for material components. Wow.
[00:15:43] Speaker A: Well, not all of them are consumed.
[00:15:47] Speaker D: How many diamonds did you buy?
[00:15:51] Speaker C: I wish, but no, I figured that was out off limits.
[00:15:54] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:15:56] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:15:57] Speaker D: Oh, my gosh. Scary.
[00:15:59] Speaker C: But yeah. My favorite item is holy book. That went through the shredder.
No, because you just need, like, a little bit of holy text.
[00:16:07] Speaker D: Amazing.
He buys it.
[00:16:13] Speaker A: The most fabulous bible that ever was.
[00:16:19] Speaker C: What I imagine happened is that I paid full price for the book, and then I shredded it myself right in front of them.
[00:16:27] Speaker A: That's how it store.
[00:16:30] Speaker D: That's the story that's going to travel around six rivers, not bathwax, death. Weird bathwat guy came in and bought a book and shredded it right in front of me like some kind of powerhouse.
[00:16:40] Speaker C: Like, the whole store is this model, right? This is a shredder right by the cash register. You go, you pick out the holy book you want, and then you walk into the register, you buy it, you put it in the shredder, and they're.
[00:16:50] Speaker A: All priced by weight, like a cut of meat.
[00:16:57] Speaker D: But what if, like, that guy, that one. I don't know if everyone will know the story, but it went viral a little while ago. How long ago? I don't know, but it was a guy that wrote his own book and got it printed by Amazon. And then in the middle of it, it had like, a pooping cat calendar or some shit. That sounds vaguely familiar to me. It was real. He showed it and, like, they got a reprint and everything, but it was very funny.
What if one of the. What if one of the holy books has like, a pooping cat calendar in the middle of it? Does it still count if you throw that?
[00:17:25] Speaker C: Oh, no.
[00:17:26] Speaker A: Oh.
[00:17:28] Speaker D: Maybe it's extra special.
[00:17:31] Speaker C: Just worried about a misprint.
[00:17:32] Speaker A: It's holy in a different way.
[00:17:34] Speaker D: Ooh, poop. Holy.
[00:17:36] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:17:37] Speaker D: Butthole, but holy.
Oh, Adam's not here. It's really sad.
[00:17:42] Speaker A: No. He might have been laughing so hard right now. He's rolling around on the floor back to the computer.
[00:17:49] Speaker D: He's just dying laughing. Absolutely.
[00:17:52] Speaker B: Do we need to tell Tyler?
[00:17:54] Speaker A: Yeah, no, he has to tell us.
[00:17:57] Speaker D: Tyler. Do we need to tell Tyler?
[00:18:01] Speaker C: He laughed too hard and now he needs a mop or something.
[00:18:08] Speaker D: Oh, are we okay? What do we. What should we do? Should we. Do you know how long he's gonna be? Nobody knows. Why am I saying this? None of us know.
[00:18:17] Speaker A: Well, did you. Did you want to do something on your own outside before entering the ale house?
Oh, it's okay if the answer is no. I. That's something where Adam wouldn't be there.
[00:18:31] Speaker D: We're talking about like, outside of town because that's where Will would have.
[00:18:34] Speaker A: Never mind. Adam's back.
[00:18:35] Speaker D: He would have. He would have.
He would have gone outside of town. Because I think I feel like whoever this is, this antagonist or whatever, who? You guys, I've been stressing out about this and I haven't come up with, like, anything specific.
[00:18:49] Speaker A: Well, we'll see what happens then.
[00:18:52] Speaker D: Oh, I'm so. I've been really nervous about this, actually. I feel like I'm dming or something.
[00:18:56] Speaker A: Do you need me to go on to like, a D and D random generator site and generate a random villain?
[00:19:02] Speaker D: Yeah, that's.
[00:19:02] Speaker A: Your name is Urine.
[00:19:05] Speaker D: It's me. Urine.
Watch out.
[00:19:08] Speaker A: Name?
[00:19:12] Speaker D: Yeah, no, I think. I think he's just going outside of town and he's like preparing himself and like putting his costume on, which is just his own. You know, he has a spell that.
[00:19:23] Speaker C: Changes his look and. Yeah. Okay, nevermind. We've already talked enough about the plan.
[00:19:28] Speaker D: If you had, you would have.
[00:19:30] Speaker C: I know what I'm gonna do.
I wonder if we'll do the same thing.
[00:19:34] Speaker D: Yeah, I know. Like, that's what I'm like. Have we talked about it? I guess.
[00:19:40] Speaker E: The plan does not have to be role played out, like perfectly without any interruption.
[00:19:46] Speaker D: Right?
[00:19:47] Speaker E: Like, we are allowed to stop and say, like. Okay, wait. What did we say we're gonna do next?
[00:19:51] Speaker D: I think.
[00:19:52] Speaker A: No, I have a stopwatch right here. As soon as we start. Bam.
[00:19:57] Speaker D: Just for this.
[00:19:57] Speaker A: It's like a clock. A chess clock.
[00:20:01] Speaker C: Yeah. How long does it take to run a mile?
Six minutes.
[00:20:05] Speaker D: Go.
Okay, let's do it. And we're waiting until we get to wait until like the sun. Do we get refreshed? Yeah.
[00:20:13] Speaker A: This is after that happens.
[00:20:14] Speaker D: Yeah, it is. Okay, well, I need. Morning. You didn't actually say that because my.
[00:20:18] Speaker A: Well, they went to breakfast.
[00:20:24] Speaker E: I'll order for the table.
We'll have a bunch of pancakes and like omelets for everybody.
[00:20:36] Speaker B: Waffles and.
[00:20:37] Speaker E: Waffles.
[00:20:39] Speaker D: Bleanies and blue.
[00:20:42] Speaker E: What?
[00:20:43] Speaker B: You know, they're wrapped. They're like the thin crepes and they have like cream cheese in them and they're yummy.
[00:20:48] Speaker A: No fun. Is no bleeding.
[00:20:54] Speaker B: I miss that guy.
[00:20:55] Speaker E: Well, I. Bacon, sausage and. Do you have different kinds of, like, juices?
[00:21:04] Speaker A: Just one.
[00:21:06] Speaker E: Which kind?
Apple of. Okay, then we'll have six orange apple juices.
[00:21:16] Speaker A: I can color them orange for you. Sure.
[00:21:19] Speaker D: Wait, now you.
[00:21:20] Speaker E: So you do have.
[00:21:21] Speaker D: So.
[00:21:22] Speaker E: Wait, let me. Sorry. Hold on. So you do have orange juice?
[00:21:26] Speaker A: No, no, I just have stuff. I can make your apple juice orange with.
Oh, you said orange apple juice, right?
[00:21:35] Speaker E: Let's just go with the regular apple juice, please.
[00:21:39] Speaker A: It's orange cheese.
[00:21:42] Speaker D: Cheese apple juice.
[00:21:44] Speaker E: Anyway, just looking to have a nice big breakfast. Because we are celebrating. Having a great time. Special day of Trent.
Not a special day. Just a normal day. Went.
[00:22:02] Speaker B: No, we're celebrating. You said we're celebrating.
[00:22:04] Speaker E: We're celebrating. But it's a normal thing.
[00:22:07] Speaker B: It's a normal celebration about the city of Trent.
[00:22:10] Speaker A: The guy's already gone.
[00:22:16] Speaker E: Yeah, yeah, yeah. We just gotta be careful. Just gotta be careful not to say that this day is gonna be special or different in any way, because it's not.
[00:22:24] Speaker B: Right.
[00:22:25] Speaker E: This is just another normal day.
[00:22:27] Speaker B: But I celebrate on normal days.
[00:22:30] Speaker E: Wait, hold on. This is special. Wait. Let's think back to what the plan was. I think the plan was. Oh, yeah.
[00:22:35] Speaker D: Oh.
[00:22:38] Speaker E: Our friend.
[00:22:40] Speaker D: Wait, what.
[00:22:46] Speaker E: Does.
Okay. Will. So wait.
[00:22:51] Speaker D: Will does not exist in this town.
[00:22:54] Speaker E: Will doesn't exist.
[00:22:55] Speaker D: Yeah, right there. It's Shamey.
[00:22:58] Speaker E: Okay, so we're not going with a diarrhea plan.
[00:23:01] Speaker D: We're not diarrhea plan. Oh, yeah. No. Thank God will has diarrhea.
[00:23:07] Speaker A: No, I tried that one in bear toggle.
[00:23:10] Speaker E: Oh, yeah, you did.
[00:23:11] Speaker A: Great success.
[00:23:13] Speaker E: Diarrhea plan.
[00:23:14] Speaker A: That's why.
[00:23:18] Speaker E: All right, so we're just celebrating being with ourselves as friends.
We're gonna have some breakfast and then bath whack King bathwack. King bathwag.
Are you ready for the present special?
[00:23:43] Speaker C: Wait, what?
[00:23:44] Speaker E: What did.
[00:23:45] Speaker C: What did you say, Abby?
[00:23:46] Speaker B: Nothing special.
[00:23:47] Speaker E: Are you ready for nothing special about to happen?
[00:23:51] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:23:52] Speaker C: And put my hands behind my head.
[00:23:57] Speaker B: Microphone.
[00:23:58] Speaker C: Hands behind my head. Stretch my feet out. I'm ready for breakfast.
[00:24:04] Speaker A: Ra.
[00:24:05] Speaker C: Very calm.
Looking forward to breakfast.
Or whatever we do after breakfast.
[00:24:14] Speaker E: I think we're all looking this.
[00:24:16] Speaker D: We're not doing anything after.
[00:24:17] Speaker E: We have no plans. Well, maybe we do, but they're just normal plants.
[00:24:25] Speaker B: Maybe we can go curling. Do you think there's a curling place around here?
[00:24:29] Speaker E: Yeah. Maybe we could go coiling.
[00:24:31] Speaker B: Maybe coil.
[00:24:32] Speaker D: Yes.
[00:24:34] Speaker E: Oh, good idea. King Bathwack, a spontaneous song in honor of this fine city of Trent. You've really taken a great liking to this city and are so great about it.
So.
[00:24:53] Speaker D: Okay, lead us in a song.
Raw.
[00:24:57] Speaker C: Oh, I thought raw.
Roscoe, are you going to sing for us?
[00:25:03] Speaker D: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:25:05] Speaker E: I'll sing the song that you wrote about this fast and evil.
[00:25:08] Speaker C: Oh, yes. I slide a napkin over in front of you.
It has nothing on it.
Okay, it doesn't even have stains on it because we haven't had breakfast yet.
[00:25:24] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:25:24] Speaker E: It's a clean, clean napkin.
Okay, here we go. Everyone can follow after me.
[00:25:40] Speaker D: Who's doing that?
[00:25:42] Speaker F: Like a ho.
[00:25:44] Speaker B: Wait, wrong.
[00:25:46] Speaker C: And then clock face and I just alternate between ra ra ray of Trent.
[00:26:05] Speaker E: City of the best city ever.
Your Trent.
Your Trent.
Your Trent.
[00:26:28] Speaker B: Oh, that was excellent.
[00:26:30] Speaker D: Should I have burst in at that point? No, I didn't want to interrupt. No.
[00:26:35] Speaker A: Then they sit there in silence for 30 minutes.
[00:26:38] Speaker D: All right, good, good.
[00:26:41] Speaker C: Now it's time for silent breakfast.
[00:26:48] Speaker D: Oh, my God. I love the idea that you guys are actually. Picture that. Like, picture pathwack and Rafina and Roscoe just kind of nervously. She mean, they're all kind of, like, weirded out that they just did that. We've never done a musical in public before.
Just looking at each other like, what did we do something? Was that something?
[00:27:07] Speaker E: All right, but so my question is, how has the. How have the other patrons of this. Of the ale house responded?
[00:27:15] Speaker A: How did that go over a couple people maybe bobbing their heads, a couple furrowed brows.
No one threw anything at you or poured anything on you? Nobody left.
One person kind of came in and then left, like, during. Yeah.
But anybody who was there, like, they were okay. Yeah.
[00:27:43] Speaker E: All right.
[00:27:45] Speaker A: You get a good feel of the place? I mean, the goal.
[00:27:48] Speaker E: The goal was to get people, like, liking bathwatch. Sure.
To feel like they.
[00:27:55] Speaker D: That was the goal. Whoops.
No, I love that so much.
[00:28:03] Speaker A: So, Will.
[00:28:05] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:28:06] Speaker A: Do you need any kind of setup?
[00:28:08] Speaker D: No, I think so. I think he starts just walking through. He's dressed in a different outfit, something you haven't seen him in before. Like, he just looks like a different person.
[00:28:18] Speaker A: Do you want to describe it?
Like, is it normal people clothes?
[00:28:22] Speaker D: Yeah, like, normal people clothes. And he's just walking through town.
[00:28:26] Speaker A: A sweatsuit.
[00:28:27] Speaker D: It's a sweatsuit. So we're gonna recognize you, right?
[00:28:29] Speaker B: Oh, you're not walking in yet.
[00:28:31] Speaker D: You will recognize, like, don't worry. I'll make a big deal. I'm sure.
[00:28:34] Speaker E: Maybe you won't.
[00:28:35] Speaker D: Maybe you'll have no idea.
[00:28:36] Speaker A: I love the idea.
[00:28:37] Speaker E: I love the idea that, like, some other random person who's not will comes.
[00:28:44] Speaker A: In and insults right out of the door. And we've been during your song, the whole plan with some random.
[00:28:53] Speaker D: And will shows up is like, where is everyone?
[00:28:57] Speaker A: Or will comes in and tries to antagonize. And you guys don't think that can't be him, right?
[00:29:04] Speaker D: And you just have to leave.
[00:29:05] Speaker A: You keep coming in as different people.
[00:29:10] Speaker D: But I'm gonna cat, like, as I go in, if there are people, like, is it super early? Are there people in the street? I'm gonna cast vicious mockery on, like, anybody I meet and just kind of like, okay, insult them. Like, as I come through this town, like, this town that feels damage. It does. Maybe I kill a bunch of people on the way in, I guess.
[00:29:30] Speaker A: Jesus Christ. Well, what's the. What's the spell thingy? How does it work? I don't think you've ever used that spell.
[00:29:36] Speaker D: I haven't ever used it.
[00:29:38] Speaker B: It's vicious mockery.
[00:29:40] Speaker D: You must succeed on a wisdom saving throw or take one. D four. Psychic damage. Is there any way for me to do it so that I'm not trying to kill? I mean, like, will does this all the time, but it's the first time, maybe that he's casting this spell to actually hurt somebody. Like, can I figure that? I'm not. I don't want to kill. I mean, maybe I do, but, you know, I want to cause harm to people. That's the point. I'm a bad guy. I'm the good guy to play the bad guy. You guys.
[00:30:06] Speaker A: All right, and what's your spell? Save DC?
[00:30:09] Speaker D: I think it's 16.
Uh oh. What does that mean? Is everyone dead? I just have killed everybody.
Where's my spell? Save DC on here, babe.
[00:30:20] Speaker A: It's on the top of your spell.
[00:30:21] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:30:21] Speaker C: I just picture you walking down the street and just. And just everyone's just, like, collapsing around you like. Like a.
[00:30:29] Speaker D: Like a plague or something. Yep, that's what I mean. And I'm. Look. And I just, like, look like a normal guy, so that's.
[00:30:38] Speaker A: Well, nobody's succeeded yet.
[00:30:41] Speaker D: Oh, my God.
[00:30:43] Speaker A: All right, well, there's six. Six different fails.
[00:30:49] Speaker C: You know that. Like. Yeah. Anyway, like, on civilians, whatever we do is, like, what?
[00:30:54] Speaker D: It's gonna come back to haunt us? Bathwhack.
[00:30:56] Speaker C: No, no. It's like, it's really deadly.
[00:31:00] Speaker D: Well, but that's. So that's why I was asking, like, isn't there a way to do this stuff and not kill somebody or two of them with a spell?
[00:31:06] Speaker A: Two of them collapse. You're not sure if they're dead, and the other four are in pain.
All right, as you go, people are starting to scatter.
[00:31:16] Speaker D: They are.
But if there's somebody who's cowering rather than scattering. Scatter? Yeah.
[00:31:21] Speaker A: I mean, like, there's enough people out.
[00:31:22] Speaker D: That, or somebody is, like, just noticing and isn't running away. I would love to go up to them and just be like, is King Bathwack here?
[00:31:34] Speaker A: I heard he was.
[00:31:36] Speaker D: Where might I find him? I, um.
[00:31:39] Speaker A: I don't. I don't.
I saw him last night. I think he went to the.
[00:31:46] Speaker B: Talk faster.
[00:31:47] Speaker A: He went to the.
[00:31:48] Speaker D: I think he went to the. I think.
[00:31:49] Speaker A: I think he went to the end.
[00:31:50] Speaker D: I reach out to somebody else and I can, like, just. If this guy. Oh, he thinks he wants to the end. Did he actually finish?
[00:31:57] Speaker A: I don't know.
[00:31:57] Speaker D: Did you say that?
[00:31:58] Speaker A: I did say that.
[00:32:01] Speaker D: I think he went to the end. I think he went to the end. I think, I think, I think, I think. I think. I think he went to the end. I just do vicious mockery, and so, like, I picture him, like, being really close to me, and then he just, like, gets hurt in front of me. Whatever. I'm trying to make everybody afraid or pay attention.
[00:32:20] Speaker A: This is the first success.
So you.
What do you say to him? I didn't make your vicious mockery.
[00:32:29] Speaker D: That's all I say. Do I have to say words?
[00:32:31] Speaker A: No.
[00:32:32] Speaker D: Every time.
[00:32:33] Speaker A: No, as long as it's a mockery.
[00:32:34] Speaker D: It's a mock. I'm mocking what he just said, literally.
[00:32:37] Speaker A: It's a true vicious mockery.
He stands up a little straighter. I saw him go to the inn last night.
[00:32:46] Speaker D: Oh, you're brave now.
[00:32:50] Speaker A: Well, why do you want to see King Bathwak?
[00:32:55] Speaker D: Ooh. Are you a follower of King Bathwack?
[00:32:59] Speaker A: No, I'm from Beartoggle.
[00:33:02] Speaker D: And so why do you care about King Bathwick?
[00:33:07] Speaker A: Why do you.
[00:33:10] Speaker D: If you want to find out, you can follow me.
[00:33:17] Speaker A: Okay.
Are you still just.
[00:33:21] Speaker D: I'll just start walking. If he doesn't say anything, I'll just start walking towards the inn, I guess, because that's what I've been told. So that's not the right place. But I'll continue to do the same thing. I don't have to.
[00:33:32] Speaker F: Cool.
[00:33:33] Speaker D: Just, you know, I'm going there, and then I'm just trying to find where Bathwack is, even though I know.
[00:33:39] Speaker A: Yep.
So, yeah, you go to the inn.
What's his face? Chumley? I don't remember his name.
[00:33:47] Speaker D: Bramley.
[00:33:48] Speaker A: Bramley. Behind the. Behind the desk, as usual.
Yes, sir. How can I help you?
I'm sorry to inform you we are all booked up for the day.
[00:33:59] Speaker D: King Bathwack.
[00:34:02] Speaker A: No, I'm sorry.
[00:34:03] Speaker D: I'm.
[00:34:03] Speaker A: Sir, my name is Bramley. My own. This in here.
[00:34:07] Speaker D: I, Eldritch, blast the corner of the room.
Like, all three bolts. As much damage as I can cause.
[00:34:16] Speaker A: Okay. Yeah, got it. Roll your damage on it.
[00:34:19] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:34:20] Speaker A: Just do damage. You don't have to roll the attack.
[00:34:23] Speaker D: Damn.
[00:34:24] Speaker A: Just roll three. D ten.
[00:34:26] Speaker E: Let's see.
[00:34:27] Speaker D: How do I do that? I feel like I haven't played d and D in a thousand years. Okay, here we go. 310. Three. Did that do it? Yep. All right, cool.
[00:34:37] Speaker A: All right. Total of 16 damage. It's pretty good. Yeah, you take a chunk out of the banister leading up to the second floor, you even punch a hole in the wall. There's some sunlight streaming in from behind onto the stairwell.
[00:34:53] Speaker D: And I laugh at the hole in the wall.
Craftsmanship. What shitty town is this?
[00:35:02] Speaker A: It's Trent, sir. What do you need?
I'm sure I could find an opening for you if you need it.
[00:35:09] Speaker D: King Bathwack?
[00:35:11] Speaker A: Yes, sir. What?
[00:35:12] Speaker D: Where is he? I've heard he's here.
[00:35:16] Speaker A: He's staying here, sir. But he left about an hour ago. I think his friends were talking about going to the ale house.
[00:35:30] Speaker D: All right.
[00:35:31] Speaker A: Is that a vicious.
[00:35:34] Speaker D: I was tempted.
[00:35:35] Speaker A: It's not vicious.
[00:35:36] Speaker D: It's not that vicious. Come on. So he went to the ale house.
I turned, is the other guy that told me the inner are still around.
[00:35:48] Speaker A: Is there any?
[00:35:49] Speaker D: But. Oh, he's gone.
[00:35:50] Speaker A: Yeah, there's people out on the street. You can see like people are kind of taking cover, if you will, or like peeking out, but it's not business as usual out there with.
With you striding up and down the road.
[00:36:03] Speaker D: Oh, okay.
What was the last thing he said? I think he's been to the ale house or.
[00:36:09] Speaker A: Yeah, his friend said they were going to the ale house.
[00:36:13] Speaker D: I'm going to use mage hand. I'm going to cast mage hand and just like knock a bunch of shit off the desk. If there's anything on the desk or behind the desk or anything like that.
[00:36:20] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:36:20] Speaker D: Just to just sweep everything out of my.
[00:36:22] Speaker A: Yeah, there's a bunch of stuff on the desk, the logbook and there's a unlit lantern and.
[00:36:30] Speaker D: Oh, an unlit one.
[00:36:31] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:36:31] Speaker D: Dang.
[00:36:32] Speaker A: Sorry.
[00:36:32] Speaker D: I thought of casting creep bonfire, but I think if I catch. If I cause a fire that will make too big of a distraction. We want people to see.
[00:36:39] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:36:40] Speaker D: At least the fire inability.
[00:36:41] Speaker A: Ramlee jumps back from the stuff, scattering away.
[00:36:45] Speaker D: Yeah. I just like, walk away and go out the door.
[00:36:48] Speaker E: This is like Will's ultimate fantasy. And his, like, most badass is when his job is to just be an asshole.
[00:36:55] Speaker D: Like, we have.
[00:36:56] Speaker E: We have set Will free and will's like, oh, yeah, boom, boom, boom.
[00:37:01] Speaker D: Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. The funny thing, like, it's so weird, he is. He is actually. Yeah, he might be enjoying this a little too much, but it's more because, like, he hasn't gotten respect in a few weeks that he's had in, like, he's used to getting respect where he's from, and now it's just like, all right, I get to make everybody feel the same way that everyone in Tivoli feels about me. Cool. You know? So, yeah.
[00:37:27] Speaker A: All right, so you're heading back up the street?
[00:37:30] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:37:30] Speaker A: Okay. Are you heading right to the ale house?
[00:37:34] Speaker D: Yes. But are there people?
[00:37:35] Speaker A: Yeah, there's people out and about, but again, like, you basically, I guess I don't know where you came from.
Are you going?
[00:37:46] Speaker D: I don't know what the town is like. I was just coming from as if I was journeying.
[00:37:50] Speaker A: There's a map, you could tell me. Okay, the bed is the inn. The Stein or mug or Tankard is the inn or the ale house.
[00:38:00] Speaker D: Okay, where did we come in from before?
[00:38:04] Speaker A: The south.
[00:38:06] Speaker D: Okay, the south road, and then that's a river, and then there's a north road and a north west road and demon's leaps from over there.
Yeah, I'll come in from northwest. Okay. Is that okay?
[00:38:21] Speaker A: Yep. So you'll probably be kind of, like, backtracking back towards the ale house then.
[00:38:26] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:38:27] Speaker A: So you actually kind of went past there.
[00:38:29] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:38:29] Speaker A: So, yeah, you're coming back through your wake, so to speak.
[00:38:34] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:38:34] Speaker A: So people here are already aware that something's happening. So people are kind of like, if there's people on, they're, like, sticking to the sides of the street and sort of scurrying past, especially if they catch sight of you. Are you very noticeable?
[00:38:48] Speaker D: Like, I look like an older man? Like a specific older man, but I haven't said it yet.
[00:38:55] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:38:57] Speaker D: He doesn't have a name, this person, as far as I can tell. I haven't looked at the wiki. Thank you. Mark Jessen.
Do I have hair? I actually don't know.
[00:39:05] Speaker A: Maybe.
[00:39:06] Speaker D: No, I've made myself.
[00:39:08] Speaker A: This is clearly an NPC that I've described.
[00:39:10] Speaker D: Yes.
I have no description. I have no name. I'm wearing.
[00:39:16] Speaker A: Do you have a personality?
[00:39:17] Speaker D: Nope.
[00:39:18] Speaker A: Okay, that's good.
[00:39:19] Speaker D: No, my personality is usually like, oh, like that. But it's not like that right now.
[00:39:23] Speaker A: I'm just walking. Are you an animal? That is racist.
[00:39:26] Speaker D: No, not. I've had one of those. What's the animal that was racist?
[00:39:31] Speaker A: The saber toothed tiger.
[00:39:34] Speaker F: Oh.
[00:39:35] Speaker D: Because it was trained to eat.
[00:39:41] Speaker A: What are they called?
[00:39:42] Speaker D: Vistani. I was like, villaki. That's a town. Yeah. So. Yep. I make my way back to. People are looking at me.
I. This is so lame. Like, will knows it's lame, but he also knows people are stupid and they love shows. So he just, like, he looks and he smirks like, the smirkiest smirk you can fucking smirk.
[00:40:05] Speaker A: Like, if he's made in a way.
[00:40:07] Speaker D: And he has, like, one hand out and he's like, you know, making little, like, colored flames fly around, like, using prestige, some bullshit. And he's like, this is so cheesy. But, like, you know, he's hoping that, you know, they'll be like, what is happening? Like drama. Uh huh. I don't know.
[00:40:25] Speaker A: Very emo.
[00:40:26] Speaker D: Yeah, he's super emo about it.
[00:40:28] Speaker A: Okay. And are you gonna go in the ale house?
[00:40:32] Speaker D: And I sing a song and it goes, Trent sucks. No, I'm just kidding.
I don't have any percussion. I can't do it myself.
Who is this? Who's following me around? Trent is the worst. Trent sucks a lot. Stinks like farts here. Yeah, it does. Ferrets are the worst. Yeah, they fucking suck a lot. Who's doing that for me?
[00:40:54] Speaker E: So will comes in singing that in response to, like, we just finished their.
[00:41:01] Speaker D: Song, jets versus the. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[00:41:03] Speaker E: I love that.
[00:41:04] Speaker D: That's perfect.
[00:41:05] Speaker A: No zip guns, guys.
[00:41:10] Speaker D: But, yeah, so.
[00:41:12] Speaker A: Okay, I'm going. All right. You're in the ale house before you sit them with.
[00:41:16] Speaker D: Oh, no. I mean, I'm not. I don't. I'm sorry.
[00:41:18] Speaker A: Sorry, I didn't know I was at.
[00:41:19] Speaker D: The door of the ale house.
[00:41:20] Speaker A: I asked if you went in. I thought you were saying yes. You went in.
[00:41:23] Speaker D: I blow the door open with eldritch blasts. Okay, if I can.
[00:41:28] Speaker A: Sure. Roll damage. I'm not gonna make you roll to hit a door.
[00:41:33] Speaker D: But I wanna know what if I roll a natural 20, though? You're kind of taking that away.
[00:41:37] Speaker A: Oh, shit.
[00:41:38] Speaker D: I don't get that last.
[00:41:39] Speaker A: You're not gonna miss unless you roll a negative or minus. How about this? You could do that, but you. If you get a natural one, you do miss.
[00:41:46] Speaker D: Okay, cool. What was that? I'm gonna say you made.
[00:41:49] Speaker E: You made Roscoe roll to hit the door when he was a boy.
[00:41:53] Speaker A: Well, come on.
[00:41:56] Speaker E: Bullshit.
[00:41:57] Speaker D: It's racist. That's what. It's bullshit.
All right. Wait, what am I. God dang. All right.
[00:42:06] Speaker A: God dang.
[00:42:08] Speaker D: That's only one, isn't it? Or is it three?
[00:42:10] Speaker A: It is one hit. Eight.
All right, those all hit. So that was almost max damage.
24. Is that right? 24 damage.
So, yeah, you blow that door right off its hinges. Guys. The door flies in.
[00:42:34] Speaker C: Does it strike anyone?
[00:42:36] Speaker D: It probably hopes so.
[00:42:38] Speaker B: It squishes two small children.
[00:42:40] Speaker D: Oh, no.
[00:42:41] Speaker A: I'm thinking you guys might have predicted will might make a showy entrance, so I'm gonna think you guys are probably in the.
In the line of fire of the door, and it. It slides in and crashes into your table and flops down over your large breakfast.
[00:43:00] Speaker B: Oh, my pancakes are flat as a pancake.
[00:43:03] Speaker A: Before you, in the doorway stands a nondescript older gentleman.
[00:43:07] Speaker D: Yep.
Ah.
[00:43:11] Speaker A: There screams ah. As the door flies in and people scatter back.
[00:43:16] Speaker E: Oh, wow.
[00:43:18] Speaker D: Bathwater.
[00:43:19] Speaker E: What are you gonna do?
This poison just put a door on our food.
[00:43:26] Speaker C: I. Shoot.
[00:43:29] Speaker A: I thought this was gonna be tomorrow.
I thought this was gonna be tomorrow.
[00:43:35] Speaker D: I thought we were just here having a nice breakfast.
[00:43:37] Speaker A: I was ready to celebrate the day.
[00:43:42] Speaker C: No, I got a message from my mom on my phone.
I was concerned with the last thing I saw, and so I was checking it but it's everything. It's fine. Okay, but I missed. I missed exactly what happened with the door. I know it blew in. I knew we were in the line of fire.
[00:43:59] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:44:00] Speaker C: But I don't know if it hit us or, like, all over our food or.
[00:44:04] Speaker A: Yes, it flew in and slammed down right on top of your table.
[00:44:08] Speaker E: What were you eating for breakfast? What was. What bathwaite have right in front of him? What was Bathwick about to put in his mouth when the door just, like, landed and, like, smushed it?
[00:44:20] Speaker C: I don't. I don't remember what your. The spread was.
[00:44:23] Speaker E: Oh, you could have had anything you ordered.
[00:44:25] Speaker C: Oh, but you ordered a bunch of stuff for us.
[00:44:26] Speaker E: Yeah, I would have ordered anything that you wanted.
[00:44:30] Speaker B: I got bleanies breakfast.
[00:44:32] Speaker E: Like fish taco.
[00:44:34] Speaker C: Yeah, breakfast. Turnip.
[00:44:40] Speaker D: Gullies and breakfast.
[00:44:43] Speaker A: Yeah, it's a turnip. And he pour syrup on it.
[00:44:47] Speaker E: That breakfast.
[00:44:48] Speaker C: That turnips and eggs.
[00:44:49] Speaker E: That breakfast turnip just got turned down.
[00:44:54] Speaker C: I'm just left holding, like, the little sprig, like, the little leaves. The greens.
[00:44:59] Speaker D: Yeah, the turnips, it wasn't even, like, cooked or prepared. It just had the greens on. Just pulled out of the ground.
[00:45:06] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:45:08] Speaker E: So you're at the head of. You're at the head of a table.
[00:45:10] Speaker C: And you slice it with your knife. You know, you're at the head of.
[00:45:14] Speaker E: The table, and Will has just entered and done this. And we all look from Will in a choreographed way. We all look from. From this guy who just walked in over to you, and you're turned down. Turn it.
[00:45:28] Speaker C: Yeah, well, I do whatever I would do in a situation like this, I'll have convenient.
[00:45:33] Speaker D: Okay, let's move on.
[00:45:39] Speaker C: No, I can.
[00:45:40] Speaker A: I'll, uh.
[00:45:41] Speaker C: I guess I had set my. My shield down on the ground, just. But I have my sword, so I'll stand up, I'll pull up my shield and draw my sword and get between whoever this is and everyone else.
[00:45:53] Speaker A: All right. And Bathwack and Rafina, you recognize this person?
This person you've seen? It was just a few weeks ago.
This is Nat's grandpa, Strahd from Barovia.
Do you remember Nat or his grandpa?
[00:46:16] Speaker B: I try to forget, but you keep.
[00:46:18] Speaker D: Bringing him back up.
[00:46:19] Speaker C: I remember Nat. I can't remember what.
[00:46:22] Speaker B: I can't remember what was distinctive about the happened. I guess nothing.
[00:46:25] Speaker D: You said it was a non descript old cast.
[00:46:28] Speaker A: You with fight, trying to find him.
[00:46:31] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:46:31] Speaker A: Like my dance.
Yeah, that's pants.
[00:46:35] Speaker C: I see, I see. So. So this is almost certainly will, or it's Matt's grandpa? All the way from Barovia.
[00:46:47] Speaker E: Wait, Matt's the kid that died?
[00:46:49] Speaker D: Yes. Yes.
[00:46:50] Speaker E: So he's kind of.
[00:46:52] Speaker A: Yeah, he's come to avenge the death of his grandmother.
[00:46:57] Speaker E: Basic.
[00:46:58] Speaker A: This is incredible.
[00:47:00] Speaker B: He's gonna throttle us all with pairs of pants.
So what? A look of recognition comes over me, but then I mask it with a look of consternation, and I nudge Roscoe, and I say through the side of my mouth, oh, wow.
[00:47:21] Speaker D: Darn.
[00:47:24] Speaker E: What are you trying to say?
[00:47:28] Speaker C: What I think she's saying? Why did you blow down the door? Nat's grandpa.
[00:47:32] Speaker D: Do you really say, nat's grandpa?
Do you really say that?
[00:47:39] Speaker B: We never knew his name, so I guess he would have to.
[00:47:43] Speaker E: Well, that's not his only option.
[00:47:47] Speaker D: Exactly.
[00:47:54] Speaker A: Does anybody actually say something?
[00:47:57] Speaker D: Nobody says anything. We stand there.
[00:48:00] Speaker B: Rufina is trying to connect with Roscoe to make sure he understands that this is it. It's go time.
[00:48:07] Speaker E: Roscoe will, with his eyes, indicate to you that, yes, he understands this.
But what Roscoe doesn't know is who this man is supposed to be or if there's some kind of. So I don't know if, like, has will selected this person because he thinks that this is a narrative that tracks, that anybody watching this will, if they knew the story, they would know why this man is picking a fight with. Yes, with Bathwatch. Okay. Because I don't know if that story. I don't know if that story.
[00:48:42] Speaker D: You're right.
[00:48:43] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah, that's good. So bathwaite didn't. Wouldn't have caught that, right?
Yeah, I'm definitely not going to say, what are you doing here, naz? Grandpa, but before I say anything, I just want to scan the room. Like, is anyone hurt?
[00:48:55] Speaker A: Uh, give me a medicine check. Is that what it's called?
[00:49:02] Speaker C: Medicine.
[00:49:03] Speaker D: Medicine. As bathwick scans the room, I want an eldritch blast.
[00:49:06] Speaker A: I can't remember what it's called.
[00:49:07] Speaker D: A couple of tables, I think it is.
[00:49:09] Speaker B: Medicine check.
[00:49:12] Speaker A: I didn't pee, you guys. Um.
[00:49:14] Speaker D: Wow.
[00:49:15] Speaker A: Pee in, like, ten minutes, maybe. Yeah, that's what my pants are for.
[00:49:22] Speaker D: Wow.
[00:49:23] Speaker E: That's pants.
[00:49:24] Speaker A: Pants, not pants. All right, what were we. Was someone gonna say something?
[00:49:31] Speaker C: Well, I wanted to see if anyone was hurt, and I did a medicine check, and then something else was happening.
[00:49:36] Speaker D: Oh, I was gonna eldritch blast. Like, as if. I think bath wack is, like, looking away. I want to be dramatic.
[00:49:43] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, well, he definitely is. He's scanning the room, and you don't see anybody hurt? It seems like the door pretty much just came in. People are definitely scared and cowering, but you don't see anybody that needs medical attention.
[00:49:57] Speaker D: I want to eldritch blast the ceiling, like, right on the side of bathwax head.
So the ceiling not directly above his head, but on the both sides above his shoulders.
[00:50:08] Speaker A: All right, so two blasts.
[00:50:10] Speaker D: So, like, if the middle piece falls on him, it might hurt him a little bit, but it's all part of the plan, and it's not offensive.
[00:50:18] Speaker A: All right, two blasts. Give me two blasts.
[00:50:21] Speaker D: Two blasts.
[00:50:24] Speaker E: I didn't.
[00:50:26] Speaker A: All right, so the first one was a.
[00:50:30] Speaker D: Uh oh.
[00:50:31] Speaker F: Oh, no.
[00:50:32] Speaker D: I'm so sorry for whoever I hit. I'm sure I'm gonna hit somebody.
[00:50:36] Speaker A: So, yeah, you're the one on the right side, smashes in and deals six force damage. The other one, it, like, powers through, like, it's like, almost like a laser beam kind of down the ceiling, and it splits one of the beams on, holding up the ceiling, and a portion of that sort of collapses down there. Basically, it sort of traps off the left side of the room as a bunch of rubble comes down in an appropriate sound like this.
[00:51:15] Speaker F: Whoa.
[00:51:17] Speaker A: And you hear behind the rubble some screams, but they don't really sound like that.
[00:51:25] Speaker D: I'm gonna kill everyone. There are gonna be no witnesses. Everyone's just gonna be dead. Sorry.
[00:51:29] Speaker A: So, yeah, the ceiling doesn't actually hit Bathwack at all, but, like, two bath whacks.
[00:51:33] Speaker D: Right? Does it hit other people? It kill other people?
[00:51:36] Speaker A: Um, you can't really tell.
[00:51:37] Speaker D: Oh, well, it's.
[00:51:38] Speaker A: It's back there.
[00:51:40] Speaker D: Oh, well.
[00:51:43] Speaker A: There'S dust.
[00:51:45] Speaker D: Fills with dust.
Do you see what you made me do? King bathwack.
All because I need to find you.
[00:51:55] Speaker C: Why do you need to find me at the same time? I'm gonna.
I'm gonna type in chat what I'm doing.
[00:52:03] Speaker D: He's gonna kill me. This is. He's just gonna kill me.
[00:52:06] Speaker E: Now, this is not for the podcast.
[00:52:08] Speaker D: I'm terrified.
[00:52:13] Speaker C: And I'm gonna step forward and try to hit that's grandfather with the side of my long sword.
You can't, probably can't tell because I'm doing this too quickly, but I'm turning the blunt side toward you.
[00:52:31] Speaker D: There's a blunt side.
That's why. Sharpen that side.
Sharpen.
[00:52:36] Speaker A: Sharpen the whole thing.
[00:52:39] Speaker C: I'm more like hitting. I'm like hitting you more like, you know, like it's a baseball bat.
[00:52:44] Speaker D: Oh, you're so stupid. Says him. Says my guy that I don't have a name for. I'm gonna have to make it up?
[00:52:51] Speaker C: Yeah, I won't get hurt. Anyone else?
[00:52:53] Speaker D: Does it hurt?
[00:52:55] Speaker A: Roll the hit, or do you try to get out of the way?
[00:52:57] Speaker D: Well, of course I tried. Well, maybe I. Well, he's chopping. You know what? I don't know. Will is just a guy, like, a month ago.
[00:53:05] Speaker A: It'll just determine if he gets advantage, basically on the hit. Are you gonna do your best to not get hit by this? This sword being swung at you?
[00:53:15] Speaker D: I feel like I would love to be a badass and stand there, but Will is, like, trying to avoid the sword, so he tries to make a normal attack.
[00:53:24] Speaker E: But how did you guys choreograph it last night?
[00:53:28] Speaker A: Let's flash back.
[00:53:29] Speaker D: Okay. Just silence. Silence.
[00:53:32] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:53:33] Speaker D: Will's like, all right, I've had enough of this. And leaves the room, though.
[00:53:36] Speaker C: All right, well, it's a 15. I don't know if I hit Will or not.
[00:53:39] Speaker A: What's your ac?
[00:53:41] Speaker D: My ac is shit. I'm pretty sure it is 14.
[00:53:47] Speaker A: All right, that hits.
[00:53:48] Speaker D: Ow.
[00:53:52] Speaker C: I mean, so I'm going to say, like, I'm not trying to do any damage with the sword, but Nat's dad. You go, grandpa. You need to make a saving throw.
[00:54:05] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:54:05] Speaker A: Oh, wait.
[00:54:06] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:54:07] Speaker A: He needs to know what kind constitution.
[00:54:11] Speaker C: You need to make a strength saving throw.
[00:54:15] Speaker A: Do you consider him an ally?
[00:54:19] Speaker C: Not right. Not right now.
[00:54:22] Speaker D: What? That's ridiculous. I ain't.
[00:54:25] Speaker C: Only if he needs it. If I'm trying to hit him, then no.
[00:54:30] Speaker D: Was that the right roll that I just did?
[00:54:31] Speaker E: Yep.
[00:54:32] Speaker D: Saving throw. There we go.
[00:54:32] Speaker A: So five. I'm assuming that fails.
[00:54:36] Speaker C: Yeah, that fails.
[00:54:38] Speaker A: So what does that mean?
[00:54:39] Speaker C: All right, so unfortunately, you take a little bit of damage.
[00:54:42] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:54:43] Speaker C: Like eight.
[00:54:44] Speaker D: Okay.
[00:54:44] Speaker C: Oh, just maybe not a little bit.
[00:54:46] Speaker D: Let me just see.
[00:54:46] Speaker C: But you also go flying back out through the door.
[00:54:50] Speaker D: Nice.
[00:54:51] Speaker C: And you're knocked prone outside the, what, like 10ft. 10ft back?
[00:54:58] Speaker D: Yeah. I like to imagine will, like. Okay, so he actually flies across the thing. Like, hurt. Gets hurt. Flies across the thing.
Oh, my God. That's terrifying.
[00:55:09] Speaker A: You're out in the street knowing that.
[00:55:11] Speaker D: This is, like, supposed to be choreographed. I just got, like, slapped across the street. And I picture, like, him sliding and just kind of, like, looking up at the sky. Like, what the fuck did I just get myself into?
And he lays there for a second.
[00:55:28] Speaker C: You hear, well, I don't know if you do or not, but I imagine you hear in your mind, Batback, saying it has to look real.
[00:55:34] Speaker D: Oh, but you don't. That's true. Yeah. Yeah, you said that earlier. You did.
[00:55:39] Speaker A: But actually, your ears are ringing because it came with a thunderclap.
[00:55:42] Speaker D: Did it actually? Is that what it was? A thunderclap?
[00:55:44] Speaker E: That's what knocked me out.
[00:55:46] Speaker A: Thunderous smite.
[00:55:48] Speaker E: Roscoe definitely turns to Rafina, and with his eyes is like, that looks.
[00:55:51] Speaker D: That looks real.
[00:55:55] Speaker A: And I, like, really impressed Rafina.
[00:55:58] Speaker B: It has an expression on her face.
[00:56:01] Speaker A: What is it?
[00:56:02] Speaker B: Sort of, like, sort of frozen in shock horror wonder look on her face.
[00:56:10] Speaker E: And then Roscoe's like, oh, God, that looks real.
Roscoe's like, everyone is doing a great job.
[00:56:19] Speaker D: That was amazing.
[00:56:20] Speaker A: This is amazing.
[00:56:20] Speaker E: You're all performing wonderfully.
[00:56:23] Speaker A: All right, so I think I'm gonna have everybody roll initiative at this point.
[00:56:28] Speaker D: Oh, okay.
Man. I wanted to get up. It's something.
[00:56:32] Speaker A: Well, you will. On your turn.
[00:56:34] Speaker E: All right.
[00:56:35] Speaker D: What if everyone comes and kills me? I'm scared.
[00:56:38] Speaker C: I can't tell if it seems like an overreaction from bath back, but you did just knock down half of a building on top of people.
[00:56:46] Speaker A: We had a natural 20 from one.
[00:56:50] Speaker E: Nat's grandpa, sir Pompey. Nice.
[00:56:53] Speaker C: Oh, dang.
[00:56:54] Speaker E: That's great. That's awesome.
[00:56:56] Speaker A: All right, so you're ready to go. You're like, what did I get myself into? I need to get myself out of it.
[00:57:01] Speaker D: No. He tries to compose himself because that really was scary. Bathwack is terrifying. Like, Will is always slightly terrified. He talks a big game to Bathwhack, and then he's always like, fuck, please don't, like, hit me in the face. Okay, so he slides. He, like, looks at the sky for a second, but then just gets up, and he's, like, dusting himself off. But, like you said, it's initiative. Like, that's what I want to. I wanted to talk. I was gonna say, is that allowed?
[00:57:32] Speaker A: You're allowed to talk an initiative. It's fine.
[00:57:34] Speaker D: Because he'd be like, now, I didn't hit you yet.
[00:57:39] Speaker A: All right. And then just to keep things in initiative order. Sorry, I'm gonna go. Shimi as Valencia Beigeman. He grabs mo and drags him over to where the ceiling fell to start to try to clear rubble away. Oh, bath whack. Go ahead. Why?
[00:57:55] Speaker C: Good.
Yeah. So, I mean, I'll run out the door. I mean, I guess I heard that.
Well, you just brought down the ceiling on a bunch of innocent people.
[00:58:08] Speaker D: I had to get your attention.
[00:58:10] Speaker C: Well, you have it.
Also, we don't insult the ferret around here. I don't know who you think you are.
[00:58:19] Speaker F: Yes.
[00:58:26] Speaker E: All part of the plan.
[00:58:32] Speaker D: I don't remember what I said last.
[00:58:34] Speaker C: It's my turn, right? I'm going to.
I'm sure this is part of our plan. I'm sure it was part of our plan. We need spectacle.
I'm going to cast. This doesn't have to be secret because it's. Will's going to find out in just a second.
I prepared a different spell zone of truth.
[00:58:53] Speaker D: He ruins the whole plan.
Oh, I love that idea.
[00:59:03] Speaker A: Cut.
[00:59:04] Speaker D: We'll come back tomorrow.
[00:59:09] Speaker C: Now, I'm gonna. I'm gonna cast daylight on the front of this. On the holy symbol on the front of this arrow catching shield, because I want it to look like we're gonna, you know, gearing up for something. I want it to look like I want to draw everyone's attention to us.
So. Yeah. So I think all I have to do, I just.
Yeah, I just have to say something and gesture. So I'm okay with this. I can cast.
[00:59:43] Speaker A: It has to check.
[00:59:47] Speaker C: Yeah. So I'll cast it on the front of the shield.
[00:59:50] Speaker A: Uh huh.
[00:59:51] Speaker C: And. I don't know. This is important.
I don't know. I'm just mentioning something, Eric, just in case it matters.
[00:59:57] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:59:58] Speaker C: But, yeah, I want to make a really bright spectacle.
Got to keep willingness in suspense.
Yeah. So what is it? It's just a 60 foot radius sphere of light that spreads out from the front of the shield.
[01:00:17] Speaker A: Yep.
[01:00:18] Speaker C: And bathrock makes a dramatic gesture, like, maybe he just swings the sword and the light spreads out into the town square or the road or the street. I mean, everyone should be able to see it within 60ft. Pretty far away.
[01:00:38] Speaker A: This bright white light just emanating out from beth wack.
[01:00:42] Speaker C: Yeah. And I hold it out, uh, from my body, um, you know, so the shield is. Is, um, ready to, you know, parry whatever will is going to do or, you know, whatever nat's grandfather's going to do to me.
[01:00:56] Speaker F: So.
[01:00:57] Speaker C: I have no idea. I've never seen this enemy before.
[01:01:01] Speaker D: Yeah. I still want to know. Like, can I tell whether he. Because he hasn't mentioned who I am. Like, I don't even know if he'll remember. Hopefully he remembers who I am, but that's kind of a mind game that I'm playing. Oh.
[01:01:12] Speaker C: Oh, I really should have said. Yeah, no, it's okay.
[01:01:15] Speaker D: You don't have to, because that's part of what I'm gonna say.
[01:01:19] Speaker C: Okay.
[01:01:22] Speaker D: Like, I'd hold my hand up against the light and be like, oh, paladin tricks and just, like, kind of glare at you. Like. Like, not even. I'm not even doing I'm not casting spells.
[01:01:36] Speaker A: Yeah, you stood up, right?
[01:01:38] Speaker D: Yeah, I stood up, and I put my hand against the light and said, no paladin tricks.
[01:01:42] Speaker A: Roscoe, what are you doing?
[01:01:47] Speaker E: Roscoe is watching.
So are they both outside now?
[01:01:53] Speaker A: I think so. Yes.
Yes, they are.
[01:02:00] Speaker E: Roscoe would. Yeah, run out to the door and look up, but he's just. He's still munching on dust, covered, like, something.
[01:02:12] Speaker D: He's a piece of plaster. He thinks it's waffle, but then he's like. Throws the piece of plaster off. There's a waffle underneath.
[01:02:19] Speaker E: Yeah, exactly.
[01:02:21] Speaker D: It's amazing. I love that.
[01:02:22] Speaker E: But he's watching wide eyed.
[01:02:24] Speaker A: Okay, Rafina, what are you doing?
[01:02:28] Speaker B: Did Mo and the. And Shimu in disguise find anybody who needed healing other.
[01:02:36] Speaker A: Working on it. You're not sure yet.
[01:02:37] Speaker D: Okay. All right.
[01:02:38] Speaker B: I head over to them in a hurry. Okay, to see if my help is needed. But I keep looking anxiously at the door.
[01:02:46] Speaker A: Okay, so are you gonna. Are you gonna try to clear rubble with them, or.
[01:02:50] Speaker B: Uh, yes. Yes.
[01:02:52] Speaker D: Okay.
[01:02:53] Speaker B: I mean, yeah, give me clear rubble.
Why don't you pick on me?
[01:02:58] Speaker E: Okay, here we go.
[01:03:01] Speaker A: Sorry.
Roscoe make a breakfast check.
[01:03:08] Speaker B: She me didn't have to make an athletics check.
[01:03:11] Speaker A: Maybe he did and you don't know.
[01:03:13] Speaker B: I guess that's true, huh?
[01:03:14] Speaker D: Did he? Did he? Did he. Did he?
[01:03:17] Speaker C: You don't know?
[01:03:18] Speaker D: Did he, did he seven. Did he?
[01:03:21] Speaker A: Well, with.
[01:03:23] Speaker D: What was it?
[01:03:24] Speaker A: Yeah, exactly. Plus his 30 check in athletics and Moe's 29.
Yeah, you can. You can clear away. It was just like a portion of the ceiling. It's not like the whole ceiling collapsed on everybody, and it seems like they were mostly trapped back there. It didn't fall on anybody directly. They seem a little bit shaken up, but you don't see anybody that is in. In dire need of your. Your healing wiles.
That's rufina wild.
[01:03:55] Speaker D: Yeah.
[01:03:56] Speaker B: Everything's a while.
I say to the shaken up folks, don't worry. It's just a nut case. It's gonna be under control. Don't worry.
But stay here.
And then I head out the door.
[01:04:11] Speaker A: Okay.
All right. So, will.
[01:04:15] Speaker D: Yeah. Okay, I say, because I said paladin tricks was less than I said.
That holy light feels so holy.
I wonder why. I wonder how when someone like you can ruin people's lives the way he does.
[01:04:41] Speaker C: Bathwick starts to get a clue, but he says in a booming but natural voice, he yells out to the street, let it be known I'm King Bathwack, and I won't let you harm another soul here on risk of your death.
[01:05:05] Speaker D: Of course you want to protect the ferret fuckers in this weird fucking town.
[01:05:10] Speaker E: Oh, my God.
[01:05:11] Speaker D: This is disgusting. Please, please.
[01:05:13] Speaker C: Are you saying that loud?
[01:05:14] Speaker D: Yes, absolutely. He's saying that very loudly.
[01:05:17] Speaker C: Just like we rehearsed. Everything's going to plan.
[01:05:21] Speaker D: Bunch of hillbillies in the middle of this disgusting town. This tacky place where the walls are made of paper.
Why are you hiding here? Of course you're hiding here. This is the perfect town for you. You shouldn't be the king of anywhere. Except for Shittown, which is apparently where we are.
[01:05:42] Speaker C: Is it someone else's? I don't know. If someone else needs to do something, you could just.
[01:05:47] Speaker A: If nobody's taking action, just keep talking.
[01:05:50] Speaker D: Yeah, okay. Okay.
[01:05:51] Speaker C: All right.
[01:05:52] Speaker A: If anybody wants to jump in, you can.
[01:05:55] Speaker B: I'm agog.
[01:05:58] Speaker D: Rafina's like, I don't like anything you're saying. Will. Stop it.
[01:06:04] Speaker A: I don't like this game anymore.
[01:06:07] Speaker E: You can make that two gogs that casmarascos have got.
[01:06:11] Speaker D: Oh, they're.
[01:06:12] Speaker B: Yes.
[01:06:13] Speaker D: He's a gagging on the plaster he ate.
[01:06:17] Speaker A: He's a gag.
[01:06:18] Speaker D: He's a gag.
[01:06:19] Speaker E: He's gogging on a ferret's dick.
[01:06:21] Speaker D: Apparently.
[01:06:25] Speaker E: That'S what we do in this town.
[01:06:29] Speaker C: I'm going to look back at Rafine and Roscoe. Is everyone all right?
[01:06:35] Speaker D: Is everything all right? Oh, my God. Is everyone all right? Except for my grandson. That's the only person you don't care about, right? Little boys who get turned into werewolves, they don't deserve.
[01:06:49] Speaker C: Bathleck looks back at you with narrowed eyes.
[01:06:51] Speaker D: Yes, everybody in this pathetic town deserves mercy, right? You're trying to save them from a ceiling collapsing on their heads. Oh, no. A little band aid. But you wouldn't save my grandson.
[01:07:05] Speaker E: Roscoe turns to Rafina, he's like, wow.
[01:07:07] Speaker D: They made a whole backstory and everything.
[01:07:11] Speaker B: I would have told you, but there wasn't time.
[01:07:16] Speaker E: Told me what?
[01:07:17] Speaker B: This is Wills. Look, this actually happened. But, I mean, Rafina tells.
[01:07:29] Speaker C: You're just, like, whispering to each other back there.
[01:07:34] Speaker E: Wow, I. Documentary.
[01:07:38] Speaker C: So I suspect this was not part of our plan.
And Will is.
[01:07:44] Speaker D: Yeah, no, Will's going for actually aggravating Beth whack.
Because what am I. What am I going to do? Be nice to you? I don't think so.
You just made my brother go away and save your stupid child is what Will wants to say. That's what he's saying. Behind those words.
[01:08:05] Speaker C: He narrows his eyes, and then he also gives you, like, a momentary, like, what the fuck, man?
[01:08:11] Speaker D: That was rude.
[01:08:17] Speaker C: And he's like, I remember you, but I. I think you're mistaken. I don't think you understand.
[01:08:28] Speaker D: Eldritch blast. Bathwhack.
Okay. God. Eldridge.
[01:08:32] Speaker A: One, two, or three?
[01:08:33] Speaker D: Nothing's gonna hit him, I'm sure. Three of them.
Nothing's gonna hit him if I kill him.
[01:08:41] Speaker A: What's your AC? Bathwater.
[01:08:42] Speaker D: Surprised?
[01:08:44] Speaker C: It is right now with my Longsword 20.
[01:08:47] Speaker D: Actually, what I would like to do is make it look like all three are hitting him. I'm not actually trying to hurt him, but I would like one of them to hit him if I can.
[01:08:53] Speaker A: You're gonna try to hit with one? One of them?
[01:08:55] Speaker D: Yeah, but make it look like the others are trying to hit him, but they miss.
[01:08:59] Speaker C: Eldritch blast is a ranged weapon, right?
[01:09:01] Speaker A: Yeah.
[01:09:02] Speaker C: Yeah. It's 22. Thank you. Arrow catching shield three.
[01:09:06] Speaker D: I clicked three times, but I think there's a delay.
[01:09:09] Speaker A: Yep. Oops. Oops. I meant to do this.
All right, so you tried to hit him with one and miss with two, and you hit with two and miss with one. So what.
[01:09:22] Speaker D: Did I do? Three of them.
[01:09:24] Speaker A: You did three. You tried to hit with one and miss with two, and you ended up hitting with two and missing with one.
[01:09:29] Speaker D: Okay.
[01:09:30] Speaker A: Oh, geez. Sorry. Bath, like, you take ten force damage as two beams of crackling energy smash your chest.
[01:09:39] Speaker C: Okay.
Ah, shit just got real.
[01:09:43] Speaker D: Like, Will is, like, monitoring this too, because he, again, does not want to actually kill Batwhack. And, like, if I mistakenly hit him with two, and I think I've hit him, like, significantly, now I'm gonna have to be really careful with what I hit.
[01:09:57] Speaker A: You hit him twice as hard as you meant to.
[01:09:59] Speaker D: As I meant to. Okay, so, like, that's the thing. Will is, like, behind this evil character or whatever angry character is, like.
You know what I mean? Like, he's like, oh, shit. Was that, like, too much? I don't know. How many points is.
[01:10:14] Speaker A: You hear gasp from surrounding windows and doors as these. These bolts strike home. You clearly have an audience.
[01:10:23] Speaker D: All right, good.
[01:10:24] Speaker A: But bathwack, you can. I said we're gonna stay out of. You could talk until someone did something. Will did something.
What do you do with your 6 seconds of fame?
[01:10:37] Speaker C: I'm gonna cast command.
[01:10:42] Speaker B: Oh, man.
[01:10:43] Speaker C: And I'm going to say the command word is flee.
And I'm going to follow it with. For your life.
[01:10:52] Speaker A: All right. So you need to make a save.
[01:10:54] Speaker D: I don't remember what's going to flee.
Wisdom. Yeah.
[01:10:59] Speaker C: You can just fail it if you want, but it's kind of fun.
Also, what the heck will like.
[01:11:05] Speaker D: Oh, my God. Natural 20. I'm never afraid of bathwack ever again.
[01:11:11] Speaker C: Yes.
Yeah, well, okay, you definitely don't have.
[01:11:15] Speaker A: To listen to me, but you can I do this?
[01:11:17] Speaker D: I go, oh, no, I'm afraid you can't scare me. I have a special someone on my side then.
[01:11:27] Speaker C: And simultaneously, I'm going to. With the rest of my. Cause I can move as well. I'm going to run right up next to him.
Right up in.
[01:11:38] Speaker A: Scare me.
[01:11:38] Speaker D: Oh, my God. He's very scared.
[01:11:46] Speaker A: All right, Roscoe, what are you doing?
Are you still a gog or a gag?
[01:11:53] Speaker E: Still a gag.
[01:11:55] Speaker A: Are you staying in the doorway?
No, I'll wander.
[01:11:59] Speaker E: I'll wander outside.
[01:12:00] Speaker A: Wander?
[01:12:01] Speaker D: Oh, what's going on here?
[01:12:04] Speaker A: Wander might be the wrong word, but Rafina.
[01:12:10] Speaker E: Ra.
[01:12:11] Speaker A: Rafina.
[01:12:17] Speaker B: Rafina goes up to the sort of perimeter of where they're having their exchanges and is sort of like, hopping up and down with.
What's the word?
[01:12:32] Speaker E: Verve.
[01:12:33] Speaker A: Verb eclat.
[01:12:36] Speaker B: Yeah, right. She's brimming with, like. She's just barely containing herself from, like, involving herself directly.
[01:12:44] Speaker A: Okay, got it.
All right. What's your ac?
[01:12:50] Speaker D: What's my ac? It is 14, I believe. Okay, 14. Yep.
[01:12:55] Speaker A: All right, so you all hear a.
And a crossbow bolt flies from somewhere behind Roscoe and Rufina and lands squarely in your shoulder. Will.
[01:13:07] Speaker E: Oh, hey, who shoot fired that?
[01:13:12] Speaker A: If you look back, you see there was a young person tending the bar in the ale house, and they've stepped up to the doorway, and they're holding a crossbow.
I just need to calculate the.
[01:13:27] Speaker D: The damage. Well, now I know where my eldritch blast is going.
[01:13:31] Speaker E: Not the bartender with the waterfall?
[01:13:33] Speaker A: No, he's not around. Uh, he. He maybe is exempt from opening. Um, you take one, damage me.
[01:13:46] Speaker D: Yep. Oh, good.
[01:13:47] Speaker E: Okay, that's good.
[01:13:49] Speaker A: And, uh, pathetic. He says, get out of our town, and it's now your turn.
[01:13:55] Speaker D: If I can manage it. I don't really react very much. I laugh at that, and I pull it out of my shoulder, and then I lick it. And inside, I'm like, ew.
Inside, I'm like, am I doing. Is this too much? I don't know. And then I just flick it onto the ground.
[01:14:15] Speaker C: Was it poisoned?
[01:14:17] Speaker D: Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, shit. True. It could be. That's amazing. I would kill myself.
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