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Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: Hey, listeners, if you go to tinyurl.com supportpfd and subscribe at the Sluglord level, Rosco will be able to afford gas to power his rutabago.
[00:00:10] Speaker B: Plus, you'll have access to bonus content about his dating app usage.
[00:00:15] Speaker A: So do it.
Thank you.
[00:00:19] Speaker B: You're listening to the show about recursive mother's milk. It's pork fried dice.
I'm Eric and I'm the Dungeon Master.
[00:00:30] Speaker C: I'm Abby and I play Rafin.
[00:00:33] Speaker D: I'm Alex and I play Batwack.
[00:00:36] Speaker A: I'm KT and I play Will.
[00:00:39] Speaker E: I'm Adam and I play Roscoe.
[00:00:45] Speaker B: Hold on to your haversacks. Let's roll.
[00:00:51] Speaker A: Like Steve Martin. I don't know if I actually remember. I think I saw it once and didn't like it because I was probably too young to even understand anything. And also probably it's bad.
So, you know, poor Eddie Murphy. Poor Eddie Murphy. I'm sure he's doing fine. I don't have any sympathy for Eddie Murphy.
[00:01:07] Speaker B: I'm sure he's feeling maybe deeply unhappy. You never know.
[00:01:11] Speaker C: We should write him a letter.
[00:01:13] Speaker A: Dear Eddie Murphy by Adam Laver.
All About Adam Laver to Eddie Murphy.
[00:01:27] Speaker B: Bye, kt.
[00:01:28] Speaker A: By me.
I. All about. I want to write a thing called All About Adam Lauber.
[00:01:37] Speaker B: But.
[00:01:39] Speaker A: Let me just explain this guy. Adam Laver. Hey, what's up? Eddie Murphy.
[00:01:43] Speaker E: What? Eddie Murphy needs to know about animals.
[00:01:47] Speaker A: Yeah. Okay, I'm gonna write that down. That's my first note for tonight. I'm not even in notes or anything. I don't have anything.
[00:01:53] Speaker E: Oh, no, me neither.
[00:01:54] Speaker A: Completely unprepared. I have no idea where my notes are.
Oh, my goodness.
[00:01:58] Speaker B: You guys are a mess.
[00:02:00] Speaker A: Yeah, you are. Your butt is.
[00:02:03] Speaker B: I've been ready since we logged off last time.
[00:02:06] Speaker A: No way. No, I know that's not true.
Just trying to get my freaking stuff, like, minimize that. Minimize.
[00:02:14] Speaker B: Okay, well, actually, no. You're gonna paste stuff in there.
[00:02:17] Speaker A: God damn it. All right. No, I don't need this open. Bye. I'm so sorry, guys.
[00:02:21] Speaker B: Here, I'll. I'll vamp for you.
[00:02:25] Speaker C: No pressure.
[00:02:26] Speaker A: Roll 20.
I'm just trying to get in everywhere.
[00:02:30] Speaker E: I don't fuck with these notes.
[00:02:35] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, I need to open that.
[00:02:37] Speaker E: Sometimes I open this document at work.
[00:02:41] Speaker A: Oh, really?
[00:02:41] Speaker E: And, like, I know work, like, can see my computer so they. They can see that I have a tab open that says, fuck with these notes.
[00:02:51] Speaker A: Fuck with these notes. Ew.
[00:02:55] Speaker E: Okay, who wrote June 14th?
Well, somebody copied and pasted and didn't.
[00:03:03] Speaker A: Change it to 14th. I want it to be 14th. Why not? I mean, let's live a little. It could be. The 14th will never be.
It could have been. It could have been.
[00:03:15] Speaker C: It could have been.
[00:03:15] Speaker B: It's about two months till my 38th birthday.
[00:03:23] Speaker E: Honestly, SNL hasn't been good since the 14th season.
[00:03:29] Speaker A: I like.
[00:03:29] Speaker E: I like that. That's like. Yeah, like expressing an opinion, but everybody just zeros in on. Wait, did you say fourteenths?
Yeah. That's the season that had Steve Martin.
[00:03:42] Speaker B: No, it isn't.
[00:03:43] Speaker A: Oh. That's all Eric knows, that Steve Martin was never a routine cast member. Eric's like, look how smart I am. Oh, I thought that's what you were saying.
[00:03:51] Speaker B: I just knew he was early, if anything. He was not.
[00:03:54] Speaker E: Yeah, he wasn't. He wasn't in the 14th season.
[00:03:58] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:03:58] Speaker B: 14Th would have been like 1990. Ish.
[00:04:01] Speaker A: Do you. 14th season 14. It started 70s.
[00:04:05] Speaker E: It started in the 70s.
[00:04:07] Speaker A: Wow. So it would have been literally 90. Well, listen, math.
Shut the hell up.
All right, are you ready?
I'm trying to move this window. There we go. I can move it. Yes. I can start. I need to find the notes. Look at all these windows. You have two screens. You don't even judge me.
[00:04:26] Speaker B: But I'm only using one.
[00:04:28] Speaker A: I'm only using one. No, you aren't, because you have this. You make me open Discord and do all this stuff. You have this all on one screen. Everything here and then you have that. And you have your iPad, which you actually aren't using right now. Yes, you are. And I have this tiny little thing with no mouse, so it is impossible.
[00:04:45] Speaker E: Look at Eric's eyes.
[00:04:46] Speaker A: I would like you to please copy and paste this because I don't think I'm going to be able to do it.
[00:04:51] Speaker B: Fine.
[00:04:53] Speaker C: Fine.
[00:04:54] Speaker A: I'll do it.
[00:04:56] Speaker B: Scared and sad.
[00:04:58] Speaker A: That's how he looks all the time. It's nothing new.
It's nothing new. Okay.
All right. Yeah, play it.
[00:05:06] Speaker B: Paste it in there. Get ready.
[00:05:07] Speaker A: I'm not going to paste anything until you start it.
[00:05:09] Speaker B: Well, you can paste it. Hit enter.
[00:05:12] Speaker A: I'm. I can hit this. You mean I can't even. Oh, you want me. Oh, I see what you're saying. And I can. Then just keep.
[00:05:18] Speaker B: Copy the red. The other one and be ready.
[00:05:20] Speaker A: Shut the up. I have to say that for Adam's sake. Cuz he wants me to be mean to you more, I think. No, I don't. Yeah, he does.
[00:05:28] Speaker E: Eric, stop your. Shut the up with your eyes, Eric. It hurts.
Yeah, this is Nick Page. Shit. Right here.
[00:05:36] Speaker A: Nick, I don't know how to. That was very Nick Cagey and not have it send. I have the other ones.
[00:05:44] Speaker B: You can't. You have to hit return when you're ready to send.
[00:05:46] Speaker A: All right, then fucking play the song.
[00:05:47] Speaker B: Okay, Fine. Previously on Pork Fried Dice.
[00:05:52] Speaker A: Melina, are you ready? Sure. And Camilla? Let's do it.
A group of weirdos just arrived. Can't believe they're still alive. After those stairs pass, the murals on the walls. Knights and pen swords and waterfalls. But no egg layers, they said. Remember Batwack's kid thought the torches were magic. They're paranoid.
Eric refuses to DM for Dominic Monahan. He simps Billy boy.
Morgantha leads them through the trap door and shows them all she's baking pies.
The fire's very hot in the stover.
Kik knocks things over.
What a clumsy guy.
Kick investigates the room, finds mother's milk and also youth. Ross goes all blanched.
Rafina, Will and Kick were coin Bathwack made the windmill fall with a huge tree branch.
Meanwhile, Roscoe knows this crone made a pie from all the bones of the world's strongest boy.
But he also cannot fathom that the pies made by this madam don't have mustard. Oi, noi.
For Yamba calls to Bella upstairs while Ophalia is gathering wood.
These strangers think these ladies are evil.
Let's cause upheaval.
This shit should be good.
The halfling woman mutters foul to cast a spell to talk to fowls. And we talk back.
We call Rafina Chicken Queen and say our owners are real mean. Our kids are their snacks.
We start to really cause a fuss, hoping the halfling will for us. She looks real sweet.
But in the chaos it's misheard that the visitors feed their birds a diet of child meat. Yuck, yuk, yuk. Here and now we all our cackling and now the bakers start to shriek.
Rafina cannot help but save us.
She does uncage us.
She sets us free.
Now we chickens run this place. After the party left a pace, our feathers fly. Muk, muk, muk, muk. Rafina took with her a hen as they passed the goats and pens Beneath a dark sky.
Now the night is getting deep. Some of the party wants to sleep. They need to camp.
Motofina sets the chicken free and it flies into a tree. Oh, what a scamp.
Now in bellies and they squat, poke swiping kid or not in a new bliet. Muk, muk, muk, muk. Poku's Party is skilled and they don't get killed by Juliet.
We're very thankful to be free leather. Smooth as smooth can be. Gomergantes are ruffled.
We know these weirdos almost drive the sliver and survive. Goli's end shuffle.
I want to tell you something that is my. This is, like, my biggest achievement. I wrote this in, like, an. Wrote it and recorded it in. What was it, like, under two hours? It was when you. Well, no, it was like, under three hours. You went to your sleep appointment, your follow up, and then you drove back, and I was like, I wrote it and recorded it. And you were like, what? And I was like, I don't know.
It was so fast. I was like, I've never done that.
[00:09:21] Speaker B: That before.
[00:09:21] Speaker A: And then I had to go back because some of it was, like, a little up. But I was so proud of that.
It took me a long time to think of it, though. Like, I could not.
I did not.
[00:09:32] Speaker C: It's so good to have something that you can repeat as many times as you need to to. Because I struggle so much with length. That's so smart.
[00:09:40] Speaker A: This was actually exactly the length of the video that I stole it from YouTube. I just. All I did was. I just. But yes, it was useful to be able to do that, but I didn't have to. I had the perfect. Oh, that's so funny. It was, like, the perfect length for what I needed. Yeah.
Yeah, that. This is my. I'm so proud of this dumb chicken song.
[00:10:00] Speaker C: It's so good.
[00:10:01] Speaker E: It's gonna be stuck in my head.
[00:10:03] Speaker C: Did we ever think we'd have a. From the perspective of a chicken recap? We never. You know, it never occurred to us.
[00:10:11] Speaker A: Well, I'm happy to do it because chickens are cool and crazy, and there.
[00:10:16] Speaker C: Was so much good information in there. And Adam put on, like, a disco ball or something in his room during it. Like, the light keeps color in his room.
[00:10:25] Speaker E: That was the light from my monitor.
[00:10:27] Speaker C: Oh, that's funny. I thought you. Your light was, like, changing colors behind you.
[00:10:32] Speaker E: Oh, no.
[00:10:33] Speaker C: I totally forgotten everything. So I'm glad that we had a recap. Good thing we do this stuff.
[00:10:38] Speaker A: That's what the recap trying to do. But I don't know. That was the. The end was a little. I really had to layer. I was like, I cannot fit all this in there. But, yeah, I hope that was.
I. I think I. I think I said most everything of what happened. I don't know if there was anything else. The stairs took a really long time to get up they did?
[00:10:59] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:10:59] Speaker B: It was a hike.
[00:11:00] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:11:02] Speaker B: Good.
[00:11:03] Speaker A: Yeah. Oh, and the torches. Wait, did I say that? No, I did say the torches. I was like. I remember Roscoe being paranoid that the torches were listening to us, and then Will was also like. Let's just assume all the torches are listening to us.
I don't think there was anything else.
We left the Dusk Queen. Bye, Dusk Queen.
Bye, Dusk Queen. Bye, loser. And then we just walked away.
And that's it.
[00:11:30] Speaker C: And so we're in a camp. We're camping.
Sleeping.
[00:11:35] Speaker B: Well, some of you are sleeping. None of you are sleeping.
[00:11:39] Speaker C: Sort of sleeping. Should I reset my character sheet, though?
[00:11:42] Speaker A: Ooh. Oh, that's usually at dawn. I guess we can see. Do we survive the night? Wait, we were going to set a watch. I think Abby said a watch. I did not include that in my recap.
[00:11:53] Speaker B: But you did set a watch.
[00:11:56] Speaker C: Set a watch.
[00:11:56] Speaker B: Yep. Go set a watchman. You did that?
[00:12:00] Speaker E: I was going to say, go set a watchman.
[00:12:03] Speaker B: You didn't. I did.
[00:12:04] Speaker E: People hated that book.
[00:12:06] Speaker C: Who? Watchman's the Watchman.
[00:12:08] Speaker B: Wait, that was the new.
[00:12:10] Speaker E: The sequel did To Kill a Mockingbird.
[00:12:13] Speaker B: Was it actually.
Right.
[00:12:14] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:12:15] Speaker E: Harper Lee's death. Yeah.
[00:12:16] Speaker C: That got a lot of negative press.
[00:12:19] Speaker A: Right.
[00:12:19] Speaker E: Cool. Because people didn't like that. Atticus Finch kind of became less perfect.
[00:12:26] Speaker A: I didn't read it. I didn't read it either.
[00:12:29] Speaker C: I haven't read it either.
[00:12:31] Speaker E: So can we really.
I don't think we should reference Ghost in a Watchmen by setting a watch in our DND campaign. If we can't, none of us are ready.
[00:12:41] Speaker C: Does that mean we can't set a watch.
[00:12:46] Speaker B: Here?
[00:12:46] Speaker C: We killed the chicken.
[00:12:49] Speaker A: And we killed the chicken.
[00:12:50] Speaker B: Kt. When you edit this, make it so that Adam said that.
[00:12:54] Speaker A: What?
[00:12:54] Speaker B: Go set a watchman.
[00:12:55] Speaker E: Go set a watchman.
[00:12:56] Speaker B: Okay, thank you.
[00:12:59] Speaker A: I am.
[00:13:00] Speaker E: How does that solve the problem?
[00:13:01] Speaker B: It solves it for me, like, personally.
[00:13:04] Speaker E: Oh, okay. Right.
[00:13:06] Speaker B: And it's adam.lavermail.com listeners.
[00:13:15] Speaker E: You can leave that in KT.
[00:13:17] Speaker A: I don't.
[00:13:18] Speaker E: Yeah, you know me. It's literally like just.
Yeah.
[00:13:22] Speaker C: Who couldn't guess?
[00:13:23] Speaker E: Yeah, I don't care.
[00:13:25] Speaker A: I don't know what that, like, is. Putting your email in, like, a verbal format, released online, able to be stolen by AI in some way, and he gets annoying spam for the rest of his life. I'm getting so much spam recently. I hate it.
[00:13:38] Speaker C: So that's why it's the worst.
[00:13:40] Speaker A: I definitely don't want to be in charge of deciding in the future. Kt. I'm so sorry. I say to myself that I'm gonna have to decide whether Adam was being serious.
[00:13:49] Speaker B: Is there anything else you want to say to yourself in the future? Right now? Like, actually.
[00:13:53] Speaker C: Good idea. We should all do that.
[00:13:54] Speaker A: Are you teaching drama?
Cool. I hope you are. It's like an 8th grade time capsule all about me. I teach trauma.
[00:14:08] Speaker B: What's your favorite? Boy band?
[00:14:10] Speaker A: I never liked boy bands, but a naked boy just ran into this room.
I love you. Good night. You don't want the camera?
Oh, you're not going to sleep? Then get the hell out of here. Okay. I love you. I'm just getting ready.
Just getting red. Getting red.
He's a goon.
[00:14:35] Speaker B: Alex, have you ever said that to your kids?
[00:14:37] Speaker A: Oh, never.
Never.
I. I do. I would not believe you even if you swore to me right in my eyeballs that you have. I would not believe you. Not for a second.
[00:14:49] Speaker C: Swear in their eyeballs. Swear in their eyeballs.
[00:14:52] Speaker D: I don't think I've said it.
[00:14:55] Speaker A: That's because you're. No, You're a terrible parent.
[00:14:57] Speaker C: Willie, no.
[00:15:00] Speaker A: Tell her to get the hell out of here.
[00:15:03] Speaker B: You can do it. Bucket list.
[00:15:05] Speaker C: Don't tell them to get the hell out of here.
[00:15:09] Speaker E: Pretend you're referencing Home Alone or something.
[00:15:11] Speaker A: Do you want to know why? Like, I'm sure I don't know if anyone's actually judging me, but, like, the reason I talk to them, like, I make those jokes like that is because. So I used to be so much more serious with my kids. Like, all so serious, because I wanted them to know that I took them seriously and I believed them and stuff. But then poor Archer.
Like, poor Archer was such a kid. Yeah. Like, he went into the class that Conan has. The teacher that he has this year was like, archer's really serious, isn't he? I feel really bad because I'm trying to joke with him sometimes, and he's offended, and I'm like, oh, no.
And so I started joking with Archer specifically, like, you stink. You know, like, trying to get him to understand that, like, when somebody is, you know, te like, to understand what teasing can be. And now he's so dryly humored to just more like Eric. Like, he gets it now. It's been a long time, but that's. We're all. That's how we all interact with each other. Like, they're still very sweet, but we definitely, like, you know, tell each other to get the hell out of here. And you should, too. You should, too. Tell your children that. Get the hell out of here.
[00:16:14] Speaker E: Get you stink.
[00:16:16] Speaker A: You stink.
[00:16:17] Speaker E: Get out of here.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: You stink.
[00:16:18] Speaker E: I like that they have a whole family that just tells each other that you.
[00:16:22] Speaker A: They stink. Yeah, you stink. Yeah, you stink.
That probably turn into something. Oh, I'm sorry. Hello, Eric. Eric's trying to get serious.
Oh no.
[00:16:37] Speaker D: I could see him revving up.
[00:16:39] Speaker A: He stinks.
[00:16:40] Speaker E: Eric's super serious, isn't he?
[00:16:42] Speaker A: Stinks.
[00:16:42] Speaker C: He's very serious.
[00:16:43] Speaker D: Eric, get the hell out of here.
[00:16:46] Speaker B: I'm revving up.
[00:16:46] Speaker E: Trying to joke with him. He gets offended.
[00:16:51] Speaker B: Alright, so you guys have set a camp, you've went and set a watch and look, I'll just say it outright. The night's gonna pass without incident. Unless one of you has an incident you need to bring to light. You guys have a lot of free time. Is there anything in character, out of character you wish to accomplish?
[00:17:14] Speaker A: Yes.
You can never ask me that question. I always will ask questions.
[00:17:18] Speaker B: I was mostly asking everybody else.
Let's start with everybody else first.
[00:17:24] Speaker C: So I shouldn't update my sheet because.
[00:17:27] Speaker B: No, it's not morning yet.
[00:17:28] Speaker C: Will is going to do something.
[00:17:30] Speaker E: Okay, one thing that I totally forgot about.
Yes, Roscoe would, before going to sleep, would take out the.
What the is this thing?
[00:17:46] Speaker B: Is it a sentient being?
[00:17:48] Speaker E: The mushroom thing?
[00:17:50] Speaker B: Yeah, the mic.
[00:17:51] Speaker E: The miconet.
He's gonna take out the mic in it and say out of his pocket and he's gonna say, hey, buddy, how you doing? And I forgot you were in there. You always got. Are you still alive?
[00:18:10] Speaker B: I live.
[00:18:15] Speaker E: Okay.
Do you recognize any thing around us or like any sort of smells or do you recognize, you know, like the white gollies and.
[00:18:29] Speaker B: It's bright.
[00:18:35] Speaker E: It's bright.
[00:18:36] Speaker A: Yeah. Bright or right?
[00:18:38] Speaker B: Right. Bright like Chris Pratt it ever would.
[00:18:45] Speaker E: Are you saying. Are you saying that right now it's bright right now or are you saying that wherever your home is is bright?
[00:18:56] Speaker B: No, this is bright.
Home is not.
[00:19:00] Speaker E: Oh, it's like dark out right now though.
[00:19:05] Speaker B: It's bright.
[00:19:07] Speaker E: Is there a. Is there a full moon right now, Eric?
[00:19:09] Speaker B: There's a little bit of a moon. It's not very bright though.
[00:19:13] Speaker E: So home.
Your home is darker than night.
Okay.
Okay, I'll think about that. You want to go back to sleep in my pocket?
[00:19:31] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:19:32] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:19:33] Speaker E: Oh, do you want me to put some dirt in there?
[00:19:40] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:19:41] Speaker D: All right.
[00:19:41] Speaker E: Rascal finds some. Some dirt and puts it in his pocket for the little mic event.
[00:19:51] Speaker B: The dirt here is a dry dirt.
Sandy. It's still dirt. It's not sand, but it's a sandy dirt.
[00:19:59] Speaker A: Cool.
[00:20:00] Speaker E: Roscoe mixes it with mustard.
I'm not gonna do that.
[00:20:07] Speaker B: Well, not intentionally. What do you think's in this pocket?
[00:20:11] Speaker A: Puddle of Mustard.
[00:20:12] Speaker B: Oh, it's my favorite rock band.
[00:20:14] Speaker A: Yeah. Puddle of Mud. Right? Puddle of Mustard.
[00:20:18] Speaker C: Mustard.
[00:20:18] Speaker A: That's great. Oh, my God.
[00:20:22] Speaker E: Okay, I put this dirt in here. All right, but before I put you away, do you have family?
[00:20:32] Speaker B: Yes.
[00:20:36] Speaker E: Okay, so I can't just, like, put you anywhere. Doc has to be, like, a specific dog.
[00:20:47] Speaker B: I can't control what you do.
[00:20:52] Speaker E: So much responsibility.
Go to bed. Get out of here. Get the out of here, stink. I'm just kidding, though, okay? I'm just preparing you for a world where people might tease you.
[00:21:11] Speaker B: It's a good parent right there.
[00:21:15] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:21:18] Speaker B: Okay, I did see. Yeah, I saw a roll in. In chat. Is that intentional? Alex.
[00:21:29] Speaker D: Whoops.
[00:21:30] Speaker B: Who are you? Who are you attacking?
[00:21:31] Speaker D: I'm not attacking anybody.
[00:21:34] Speaker C: It's dead.
[00:21:34] Speaker D: But I, I. Yeah, I was.
[00:21:37] Speaker B: I mean, it's a 28 to hit.
[00:21:39] Speaker A: Oops.
[00:21:41] Speaker D: Just out of. No, out of nowhere, a flail just comes.
[00:21:47] Speaker C: Mid sentence.
[00:21:49] Speaker A: There are no mushroom people in Gully's end. Oh, man. He's got a lot of kingly demands. You guys. Watch out.
[00:21:55] Speaker C: Shoot, this is gonna be a problem.
[00:21:59] Speaker D: Well, I'm gonna spend some of my time attaching the. Well, if Will still has any of my stuff, I'm gonna get it back.
I can get my pack back and stuff.
[00:22:10] Speaker A: I don't think I have anything of yours.
[00:22:13] Speaker D: Okay.
Anything that Will. That Will didn't steal.
Well, all right. So I'm going to spend some of the time looking through my pack to make sure it coincides with my item list here.
[00:22:28] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
[00:22:30] Speaker C: Whoa.
[00:22:32] Speaker B: Well, you want to run through it?
[00:22:34] Speaker C: We're definitely not going to be alive by the end of the day. The end of the night. This is terrible.
[00:22:38] Speaker B: Yep. Don't reset your character sheet.
[00:22:42] Speaker D: First, I'm going to affix the Ruby of the war Mage, which I hope is still there, to the flail.
[00:22:52] Speaker B: That's still there. Yep.
[00:22:54] Speaker D: So can I do that? I think it takes some time.
[00:22:57] Speaker B: You got time.
[00:22:58] Speaker D: All right.
And then I'm.
For a time, I wasn't wearing my armor.
I feel like that's a bad move.
So if I can. I'm gonna put the armor on underneath the.
It's just chainmail. And put it on underneath my clothes.
[00:23:19] Speaker A: It's gonna.
[00:23:19] Speaker D: My sword still there. I think it is.
I don't care. I have to get back the good. The good old bathwack smell.
[00:23:28] Speaker A: Ew.
[00:23:33] Speaker D: Let's see what would Will not steal would. Will wouldn't steal any of my torches or my tinderbox or my water skin or my rope.
[00:23:41] Speaker B: You don't know what's in the water skin, though.
[00:23:46] Speaker D: Do I have my deck of illusion in there?
[00:23:49] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:23:50] Speaker D: Yeah, I got my.
I'm gonna. Can I put on my robe of eyes?
[00:23:57] Speaker A: Sure.
[00:23:59] Speaker D: I guess the problem is you're starting to bulk up.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm gonna. Maybe I'm gonna take off my. Oh. What just happened?
[00:24:08] Speaker B: Adam quit. He doesn't like the word bulk.
[00:24:11] Speaker A: He doesn't like the word bulk.
That's amazing.
[00:24:16] Speaker D: Adam. Is something. I said.
[00:24:17] Speaker A: It's okay.
[00:24:19] Speaker E: I didn't blanch at the word bulk, but I bulked at it.
[00:24:24] Speaker A: Bulked it. Bulk. Nice.
Bulk. I always thought that was such a weird bulk.
[00:24:30] Speaker C: Bulk missing.
[00:24:32] Speaker B: Ready, Camila. Bulk.
[00:24:34] Speaker A: Bulk.
[00:24:40] Speaker D: I really need my deck of cards that I've been working on. I hope that's in there.
[00:24:44] Speaker B: Yep.
[00:24:46] Speaker D: And I hope my shield is around. My arrow catching shield.
[00:24:51] Speaker B: I assume so.
[00:24:52] Speaker D: Yeah. I mean, it's pretty big. It's hard to not see.
I am going to stow away the robe of billowing for now so I'm not too bulked up. And I'll take off my. My. My fisherman gear and exchange it for the.
I'll exchange it for the robe of eyes and then just use the illusion to cover it.
I have in my inventory book Will wants, But maybe I don't have it anymore.
It is in my inventory as book Will wants.
[00:25:28] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:25:29] Speaker C: You should have seen the face that KT made just with their eyes.
[00:25:36] Speaker D: I don't care if that's not in here, but if it's moved, I just want to make sure it didn't get lost because it seemed kind of important.
[00:25:42] Speaker C: How would you know?
[00:25:44] Speaker D: Is the book in there?
[00:25:45] Speaker C: How would you know if it's lost?
[00:25:46] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm looking around for it.
[00:25:49] Speaker B: He needs to know if it's in there or not.
Is it in there?
[00:25:54] Speaker C: How would you ask?
[00:25:55] Speaker B: I'm asking, K2.
[00:25:56] Speaker A: I'm going to say that although I had planned on looking through your stuff and potentially almost certainly taking that book, I am pretty sure I never got the chance to do that.
I think we were so busy on the boat, I don't think I was ever in that room, like, just hanging out. I literally got bothered every time I went in my room and then my stuff got moved.
[00:26:21] Speaker B: Now we know why Bathwack did all that shit.
[00:26:24] Speaker A: Now we know why Bathwack did all that shit.
[00:26:26] Speaker B: Keep him from fucking with you from. Keep you from Fucking with his shit.
[00:26:29] Speaker A: Yeah, he busted a hole in the.
[00:26:30] Speaker D: Wall just to make sure it was all premeditated. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank goodness. All good. The book Will once is still here. Okay.
All right, well then the other things I need for the evening, now that I've put this jewel on here, do I have the jeweler's tools and some of the other crap that I got so that I can work with clock face.
[00:26:52] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:26:52] Speaker D: I think we'll wouldn't steal those. I'm gonna. I'm gonna spend some of the night working on making a new holy symbol. But I expect it to take a long time and I suck at it. So maybe I can catch clock face and we can sit down together and pantomime how exactly to do this.
[00:27:12] Speaker B: Yeah, I think you could definitely help with that.
Let's see. There should be a role for that. What kind of roll?
[00:27:19] Speaker D: I don't know. Is it like sleight of hand or sit?
[00:27:25] Speaker B: Well, let me look up jeweler's tools.
[00:27:28] Speaker D: Oh, yeah.
[00:27:35] Speaker B: So they let you add your proficiency bonus to any ability checks you make using the tools. Well, that's not helpful. Doesn't tell me how to use them. Come on.
It's like this game is open ended or some.
So, okay, it's not strength based, not constitution, probably not charisma based. Right?
[00:27:59] Speaker A: I mean, he's making a holy symbol.
[00:28:02] Speaker D: It's either. It's probably either like charisma or dexterity or some combination.
[00:28:08] Speaker E: Check.
[00:28:09] Speaker A: Yeah.
Yeah.
[00:28:12] Speaker D: All right.
[00:28:13] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:28:14] Speaker D: All right, let's check.
[00:28:17] Speaker B: Let's check it.
[00:28:19] Speaker D: Check it.
[00:28:19] Speaker A: All right. Check it.
[00:28:21] Speaker B: Eight. Eight.
All right. They're not done. It's not done tonight.
[00:28:29] Speaker D: All right.
[00:28:29] Speaker B: It doesn't mean it's. And you have to start all over anything, but it's just.
[00:28:33] Speaker A: He's all sweaty. He's like. Yeah, he's like hammering away.
But then you look at it, it's just like, like, it's just like a piece of metal that's been smashed in a bunch of different directions. Like.
Yeah, that's right. Clock face is like, what?
[00:28:50] Speaker E: Raw?
[00:28:54] Speaker D: And then we. And then we trade. We trade. He takes my crap and I. I get his beautiful, like, link. He's made one link.
This is how it's gonna go the whole time.
I'll be like, look what we made. And he'll be like, ra.
[00:29:13] Speaker B: There you go.
[00:29:21] Speaker D: All right. The. The last thing I want to do is slip off into the woods when everyone's quieted down.
Not to use the bathroom.
[00:29:31] Speaker A: Yeah, right.
[00:29:32] Speaker D: Yeah.
No, I. I want to go and see If Xantras will talk to me again.
[00:29:39] Speaker B: Okay, you trying to sneak away, or do you just excuse yourself and say you're gonna take a shit?
[00:29:47] Speaker D: Yeah, actually, I mean, it's more of the latter, probably.
Just walk away. Yeah.
[00:29:53] Speaker C: So you don't have to lie.
[00:29:55] Speaker D: No, I'm not. Yeah, I'm also not trying to be sneaky, but I'm trying to walk away out of hearing range. If someone's gonna follow me, then fine.
[00:30:05] Speaker B: Does anybody try to follow him?
[00:30:08] Speaker C: I'm doing cat's cradle with some string I found.
[00:30:12] Speaker B: What's Rafina doing?
[00:30:16] Speaker A: Look, guys.
That's so cute. I wish you held up your fingers.
You're right.
[00:30:25] Speaker C: I've got these hair bands here. Here we go.
[00:30:27] Speaker A: Here we go.
Cute.
[00:30:31] Speaker B: I guess no one's following you. That's what it sounds like.
[00:30:33] Speaker D: All right.
[00:30:33] Speaker B: Or if they are, they told me secretly, and they don't want you to know.
[00:30:36] Speaker A: Think of a reason to follow him. But if he. I think he's taking a crap. I'm not following him.
[00:30:41] Speaker B: He didn't say that.
[00:30:42] Speaker A: All right, can I look through his. Not his. His stuff?
[00:30:47] Speaker B: Yeah, you gotta figure out what I ate.
[00:30:52] Speaker D: Oh, Adam didn't like that. Adam made it. Really? Adam's like, no way.
All right, so while I'm walking away, I'm.
I'm just repeating again. Are you bored, Xantras? In my head, I'm not saying anything out loud.
[00:31:14] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:31:14] Speaker D: And I'm wondering if I hear anything.
[00:31:18] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:31:20] Speaker D: Once I get far enough out of your shot, I'll start talking out loud.
[00:31:24] Speaker B: Okay.
All right. You don't hear anything in your head, and eventually you judge that you're far enough away that no one can hear you unless they followed you.
[00:31:42] Speaker D: All right, Santras, you know I'm here, right?
Pretty quiet.
Are you here in G's End or one of the other gods of the Ember temple?
What do you. What do you say we.
We remove the other slivers and rule this together?
You can be the only one here.
We'll get rid of all the other ones, and then I won't have to leave Gully's End when this is all over.
[00:32:37] Speaker B: Give me a perception role.
[00:32:52] Speaker D: One of my. One of my best roles.
[00:32:53] Speaker B: 8.
[00:32:54] Speaker D: Another 8.
[00:32:58] Speaker A: Xantras is standing right behind you. Just like.
[00:33:02] Speaker D: Yeah, I have the robe of eyes, if it matters.
So it's not as dark for me. Oh, and I can see all around me.
[00:33:10] Speaker B: Well, then roll with. With advantage. So just roll it again.
[00:33:14] Speaker D: Oh, really? Roll it again.
That seems cheating. I should just click. Roll again, right?
[00:33:19] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah.
[00:33:21] Speaker D: Should I click Advantage or just roll again?
[00:33:23] Speaker B: No, no, no, no.
[00:33:24] Speaker D: Just roll. Yeah.
[00:33:25] Speaker A: Hopefully it's higher.
Hey, that's better.
[00:33:29] Speaker B: That is better. It's a.
What? Sounds like a.
Like a stick or a branch breaking back into your right a little ways.
[00:33:46] Speaker D: I'll turn around slowly.
I'll get up my.
I'll put my. I have. I have the flail with me because I'm.
It's dark. You know, I'm not really worried about people seeing kick holding a flail.
Maybe I should be.
Do I see anything?
[00:34:10] Speaker B: Give me another perception roll with Advantage.
[00:34:17] Speaker D: Click.
Click. You can keep all the clicks in.
[00:34:24] Speaker B: Click.
[00:34:28] Speaker D: It's about the same to 13.
[00:34:30] Speaker B: Okay. Give me a second here.
Okay, you see some movement in the area where you heard that branch break, and you see what looks like the edge of someone's shoulder or arm behind a nearby tree.
[00:34:52] Speaker A: Oh, geez.
[00:34:54] Speaker D: Oh.
I'm gonna run as fast as I can and tackle that person, that thing, whatever it is. I'm gonna figure out who it is. Hopefully it's not Will. Sorry if I break your arm. Will.
Go.
[00:35:08] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:35:09] Speaker D: Charge. Yeah.
[00:35:10] Speaker B: All right.
Give me an athletics check to see how quickly you advance on your target.
[00:35:21] Speaker D: Oh, it's.
[00:35:21] Speaker B: Well, that one wasn't supposed to be with Advantage, so it's not a natural 20. We'll take the first one, but it's still a 26.
[00:35:28] Speaker C: Wow.
[00:35:28] Speaker A: Holy shit. A 26 and a 29.
[00:35:30] Speaker B: You rush without. You know, you're not trying to be sneaky, so you're just crash right over. So you see the edge of the arm, sort of duck behind the tree as you are almost on top of whoever it is, and you round the corner and pounce upon none other than Shimi.
[00:35:51] Speaker D: I hit him. Crap. I hit him pretty hard after I broke his leg.
[00:35:54] Speaker C: I know.
[00:35:57] Speaker B: One eye, huh?
[00:35:59] Speaker E: Broke leg. Batwack is the villain impaled by a batwack.
[00:36:07] Speaker B: You blinded my one eye.
There's a patch on it.
[00:36:16] Speaker D: Are you. Are you okay?
What are you doing following me out here?
[00:36:22] Speaker B: Oh, I don't know. I wondered.
Wondered what you were doing.
[00:36:28] Speaker D: I just had to go to the bathroom, and then I just started talking to myself, you know?
[00:36:35] Speaker B: Well, I mean, one.
You didn't go to the bathroom?
[00:36:40] Speaker D: Well, not yet. I got interrupted.
[00:36:42] Speaker B: Well, you said. And then.
And you weren't exactly talking to yourself, I don't think. Were you?
[00:36:50] Speaker D: Ah, no. Who was I talking to?
[00:36:54] Speaker B: Oh, I think we know who you were talking to.
[00:36:57] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:36:58] Speaker B: What was that about?
[00:36:59] Speaker D: It's not for you to know.
[00:37:01] Speaker B: Oh, well. But I do know.
[00:37:03] Speaker D: Sure.
You know what I said.
[00:37:06] Speaker B: Mm.
[00:37:10] Speaker D: Be best if you kept it to yourself.
[00:37:12] Speaker B: Why?
[00:37:15] Speaker D: Because you don't know what you're getting into.
[00:37:18] Speaker B: Well, maybe I should know.
[00:37:22] Speaker D: Not sure about that.
You might be in danger.
[00:37:27] Speaker B: Oh, I think we might all be.
Especially hearing what you were saying.
[00:37:32] Speaker A: Oh, she me.
[00:37:36] Speaker D: I just don't want you to get hurt.
[00:37:38] Speaker B: No, I don't either.
And from what it sounds like you maybe have in store, I don't know that that's any less likely to happen. Perhaps. Maybe more likely.
[00:37:55] Speaker D: Well.
[00:37:58] Speaker B: I thought Will told you not to talk to Gods without him.
[00:38:04] Speaker D: I don't want Will to get hurt either.
[00:38:08] Speaker B: Well, I mean, I think that's kind of why he suggested such a course of action, I guess. Apparently, you don't have a good track record in this venue, so to speak.
[00:38:22] Speaker D: Well, no one answered, so you don't have to worry about it yet.
[00:38:27] Speaker B: Oh. Phew.
[00:38:32] Speaker A: Good job. She me.
Phew.
[00:38:38] Speaker D: Why don't you go mind your own business?
I'll walk back to the camp.
[00:38:46] Speaker A: Oh, my God.
Amazing.
[00:38:56] Speaker B: KT's all hot and bothered.
Terrified.
[00:38:59] Speaker A: And the funny thing is, the thing I wanted to do had to do with Shimi. And I feel like it would have been interesting if I did it before, but now it's just gonna feel like it's in response to this, but it's not in response to this, so anyway, fine, go ahead. No, no. So I just. All I wanted to do was give Shimi the fly. My flying boots.
[00:39:18] Speaker B: Oh, okay.
[00:39:22] Speaker A: Because.
Well.
[00:39:23] Speaker B: What's up, boss?
[00:39:26] Speaker A: Well, I didn't want to interrupt. I just thought it was fun. I'm sorry.
[00:39:30] Speaker B: The conversation was over. Okay, but this could have happened before. It's fine, I think.
[00:39:36] Speaker A: Well, no, I don't want it because, like, I, I. You didn't know that I was gonna do that, so you acted. I don't want to take away she's badassness talking a bathwhack like that. Like, without the boots of flying. So, like, holy.
[00:39:48] Speaker B: I mean, Batwack has them too.
[00:39:51] Speaker A: Yeah, but, like, at least they would just be flying at the same rate. So, like, if they're flying at the same rate, like, what is Batwack gonna do? I guess you could throw something at him.
[00:39:59] Speaker B: Anyway, it could turn into, like, the Neo Mr. Agent Smith fight in Matrix Revolutions.
[00:40:07] Speaker A: I don't remember. Where are they flying in slow motion?
[00:40:09] Speaker B: They're, like, flying through the sky and fighting in the rain. Like an anime movie.
[00:40:15] Speaker A: Cool.
[00:40:15] Speaker B: Smashing through buildings.
[00:40:17] Speaker A: I remember, like, where he, like, all the Agent Smiths are Everywhere. Are you talking about.
Oh, this is the first one.
[00:40:23] Speaker B: Nope, the third.
[00:40:24] Speaker A: Oh, I didn't hear what you said. Sorry.
[00:40:25] Speaker B: Anyway, Revolutions.
[00:40:26] Speaker A: Okay, cool. I don't remember.
So.
So like my purpose of doing this was because I've been thinking. I keep. I am so glad you gave us the opportunity to do just anything because I have been killing myself over the fact that we kept going. We need to get Chimi some armor. We need to get Shimmy some things. And we never got Chibi a single thing. And then his eye came out. So I have been thinking about the.
[00:40:51] Speaker B: Fact got stabbed with a dart.
[00:40:53] Speaker A: Eye is gone. Basically. It got stabbed with a dart. So, you know, it's not going to look great. It doesn't look great.
[00:40:57] Speaker B: It's white.
[00:40:58] Speaker A: It looks cool. Quote, unquote. Anyway, I.
I think Will just realizing, I mean like, it feels so dumb that we didn't get him anything. So Will's going to be like, okay, listen.
I mean, I guess now is this afterwards?
[00:41:12] Speaker B: Sure.
[00:41:13] Speaker A: Okay, well, Will goes up to you not knowing anything and is like. Well, he tries to pull Shimi aside.
[00:41:20] Speaker B: He jumps when you like.
[00:41:22] Speaker A: He does?
[00:41:22] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:41:23] Speaker A: Aww.
[00:41:23] Speaker B: Shimmy comes back and it's just like kind of looking into what small fire I'm assuming is lit or something like that.
[00:41:30] Speaker A: Oh, Shimi, he's all serious, but I don't notice anything. Oblivious, I guess. Anyway, well, I just, yeah, I like tug him somewhere. I don't want him. I don't want to do. I don't like it when Rafina sees me do nice things. Says.
[00:41:47] Speaker C: It'S really into. She's making this huge like Eiffel Tower looking sort of thing out of the string. So she's really involved.
[00:41:55] Speaker A: Amazing. I love it. Well, so he pulls him aside and he's just like, hey, well you, you know, we're in stupid land now. Apparently pugilistic is just the word that keeps reverberating.
[00:42:06] Speaker B: Yeah, keep hearing that word. Pew Puge.
What does it mean?
[00:42:11] Speaker A: Pugilistic?
[00:42:12] Speaker B: Yeah. I don't know that word.
[00:42:14] Speaker A: It's like, like they punish each other a lot. They.
I think that's the definition. Punishment.
[00:42:21] Speaker B: Doesn't sound like you know what it means either.
[00:42:22] Speaker A: I know what it means.
[00:42:24] Speaker B: Maybe it means they really like candy.
[00:42:26] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what it means. All right, see you later.
[00:42:29] Speaker B: Okay, bye.
[00:42:30] Speaker A: No, it means like if you do something, they're going to kick your ass. All I'm saying is now we're in this crazy area and I realized that we didn't get you anything, so you need to Wear these boots so if there's something that happens, you can fly away and not get killed.
[00:42:45] Speaker B: I mean, like, I don't plan on getting in any trouble.
[00:42:48] Speaker A: She me? You idiot. You get in trouble everywhere we go.
[00:42:52] Speaker D: What?
[00:42:52] Speaker A: Yes, okay, listen.
[00:42:54] Speaker B: What?
[00:42:54] Speaker A: You didn't get in trouble on the boat, I'll give you that.
[00:42:57] Speaker B: That's right.
[00:42:58] Speaker A: Thank goodness. Because you're the only one that probably kept me sane during that time. I didn't. I didn't stay sane. I was about to lose my mind.
But you, you almost lost an eye. You need to wear these fucking boots until I can get you some kind of uniform that covers all of this. Also, you might want to reconsider traveling with us.
I brought that up before and you said no.
[00:43:23] Speaker B: No. Well, that ship has sailed. We're a unit or a team.
[00:43:28] Speaker A: She, me. You're 14 years old.
[00:43:30] Speaker B: The gods have entrusted us with saving this world, okay?
[00:43:34] Speaker A: She, me, they've entrusted some of us with saving the world. Mo wasn't even included in that, as far as I know.
[00:43:41] Speaker B: Yeah, but I don't hear you trying to get rid of him.
[00:43:43] Speaker A: Mo is not somebody. First of all, I think Mo is at least in his late teens, if not twenties or whatever the relevant lizard folk age would be for something to make those decisions. You are a kid and all I'm saying.
[00:43:59] Speaker B: Well, how old do I have to be to make those decisions?
[00:44:07] Speaker A: Just shut up. Okay?
[00:44:08] Speaker B: Let's codify the age of consent.
[00:44:10] Speaker A: No, because I do not.
I do not need for you to be gathering friends in the next town we come to and just bringing along another gang of kids with us or something, okay?
[00:44:21] Speaker B: What?
[00:44:21] Speaker A: Like, I'm just saying.
[00:44:22] Speaker B: Come on. There's only room for one rambunctious, precocious puzzle master. Puzzle master.
[00:44:30] Speaker A: Right. Puzzle master.
Things have been cute so far, but what I'm saying again is that we're headed into this is bathwhack land. Okay? This is where bathwack comes from.
[00:44:42] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:44:42] Speaker A: This place, it's got to be bad. Okay? It's got to be really bad.
[00:44:46] Speaker B: Nice, though.
[00:44:47] Speaker A: He's so nice. Yeah. That's annoying. What, are you defending him? Fine, whatever. All I'm saying is the guy that, you know, he almost broke your leg that one time.
[00:44:56] Speaker B: Retcon.
[00:44:56] Speaker A: Oh, Retcon.
[00:44:57] Speaker B: He would not have said that in this moment.
[00:44:59] Speaker D: Oh, no, he wouldn't have. I was a little bit surprised. I was quite surprised, actually.
[00:45:03] Speaker A: He really defended you. Yeah. Okay, what was the last thing that.
[00:45:07] Speaker B: Would have you said? This is Bathwhack place.
[00:45:10] Speaker A: This Bathwack place. It's got to be bad.
[00:45:14] Speaker B: Yeah. I mean, you probably maybe.
[00:45:16] Speaker A: Yeah. Imagine a land full of giant, muscly people who want to kill small werewolf children. That's what I picture this place as. And they all live in a dry.
I'm looking around. Are there trees here? Yeah, I'm already wrong. But anyway, this place can't be good bathwhat comes from it. And.
But jokes aside, pugilistic.
[00:45:43] Speaker B: Yeah. Which means, like, maybe punishing.
[00:45:46] Speaker A: Yeah, maybe punishing. Listen, I'm not a fucking dictionary, okay? Okay, I didn't get educated, but I know what pugilistic means. It's not good, okay? It's just not good. You don't want to get pugilized.
[00:46:00] Speaker B: No.
[00:46:00] Speaker A: Just take these boots. Just take the boots. I am absolutely sure, because we haven't gotten you anything. Other than that, I don't even know what else I have to protect you. Stupid idiot. I gave my lucky stone away.
I don't know what else to give you.
[00:46:15] Speaker B: I mean, is this. Are these, like, actual, like, flying boots? Or is this like the time where you keep talking about where you trick that kid by giving him some glowing orb that you just made up for him, which I guess eventually ended up.
[00:46:27] Speaker A: What would that do? Shimi, look at me. What would that do? I give you fake boots so you can, what, be sad when you try to fly away? What the f. Why would I do that to you?
Have I not protected you? When we went in that windmill, you know what I thought? Those witches that we saw in there. Oh, sorry, not windmill. It was like a windmill that. I was in that lighthouse. You know, that stupid lighthouse we were just in. Those women in there were like, these other women that we saw in Barovia that ate children.
I pushed you behind me, okay? Like, I'm trying to protect you. Why are you being a dunce right now?
[00:46:58] Speaker B: No, I'm sorry. I just.
[00:46:59] Speaker A: I push them at him. Just, like, shove them into his chest.
[00:47:01] Speaker B: Okay? Okay.
[00:47:02] Speaker A: Put them on.
And don't get into trouble, because I don't know how well I can get you out of it. I don't know what it's like here.
[00:47:11] Speaker B: I mean, as it's been established so I can take care of myself.
You're way more.
[00:47:18] Speaker A: I do this to my eye. I just go, like. I just. Whatever. Yeah. Like, I tap it. Like, I'm. Like a thought, but your eye, like, whatever. I.
[00:47:26] Speaker B: He doesn't get it.
[00:47:27] Speaker A: Okay, good job.
I just let him keep talking.
[00:47:30] Speaker B: But I'm just like.
I mean, like, I think, like. Okay, you Were talking about comparing me and Moe. And like he's like able to decide his own fate of whatnot.
[00:47:44] Speaker A: Look at you and look at Moe.
[00:47:46] Speaker B: Yeah, but like, who has been almost dead more.
[00:47:52] Speaker A: All I'm saying is that I don't want you to actually die because then we would have to waste a diamond and resurrect you.
[00:47:58] Speaker B: I just think and he leans close.
I think I've got the brains to manage.
[00:48:08] Speaker A: Listen, I have brains too, but I also have magic. What do you have?
[00:48:12] Speaker B: I've got.
Well, yeah, let's think.
First of all, we've both got brains, right? So there's that. Check mean I've got these flying boots now.
[00:48:23] Speaker A: Did he put them on? He pointed down.
[00:48:25] Speaker B: That's cute.
[00:48:25] Speaker A: Is he sitting there? Put his boots on as he talked. Cute?
[00:48:28] Speaker B: I mean, they look pretty good.
[00:48:30] Speaker A: Are they huge?
[00:48:32] Speaker B: He puts them on and they look like they fit him.
[00:48:34] Speaker A: Oh, interesting.
[00:48:35] Speaker B: That's so weird, Will. A small feet.
What is that, an insult?
Lots of people have small feet. That doesn't say something about someone's character.
[00:48:47] Speaker A: I don't know what you're trying to do.
[00:48:51] Speaker B: Anyway, we go both got brains. I got these boots. Can you fly?
[00:48:55] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:48:56] Speaker B: Oh, right.
Well, I have a good.
I've got street smarts. You ever heard of street smarts? I think you have.
[00:49:08] Speaker A: I've never heard of street smarts. You have.
[00:49:12] Speaker B: And you know how much that could do for him For a young lad.
[00:49:16] Speaker A: Not a young lad in a group of very powerful magic users and sword wielders traveling across the land trying to fight gods. Sorry, I don't think a normal human 14 year old child care is.
[00:49:33] Speaker B: My role in the group is not godfighter. It's puzzle master cook.
[00:49:38] Speaker A: Okay, but then that's why I'm giving you the boots. So you can fly away if anything happens.
[00:49:42] Speaker B: And then maybe I'll take control of another boat and save the day once again, right?
[00:49:52] Speaker A: Shimi, you keep. Listen, you can't out conversation me. You keep mentioning things that have fortunately happened. That doesn't mean that what we're heading into is not incredibly dangerous. We're walking in to a coup. Do you know what that is? You know what that word is?
[00:50:10] Speaker B: I mean, like, it makes me think of birds.
[00:50:12] Speaker A: Yep, that's what it is. We're walking in the birds.
[00:50:14] Speaker B: Like they explained it. It was like the people took over and.
And kicked our batwack out. People? The throne.
[00:50:24] Speaker A: Who are those people, Shimi?
[00:50:26] Speaker B: I don't know.
[00:50:26] Speaker A: Yeah, you don't know. They're people with swords. Big muscular people.
[00:50:29] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm not gonna get anywhere close to them.
[00:50:31] Speaker A: All right, so where are you gonna be?
[00:50:33] Speaker B: I mean, like, I'm not gonna be noticed by them. It's more like.
[00:50:37] Speaker A: All right, good luck with that.
[00:50:38] Speaker B: Yep. And then all of a sudden, the pants are around their ankles, and you got the advantage. I'm standing behind him with the belt, laughing.
[00:50:44] Speaker A: She me.
[00:50:45] Speaker B: You stab him in the dick.
[00:50:46] Speaker A: She me.
Okay.
[00:50:49] Speaker B: All right, you, Eldritch, blast him in the dick.
[00:50:51] Speaker A: All right, Rafina. Just kidding. Don't come over here. But also. Yes. Come here.
[00:50:55] Speaker B: You hear that, Rafina?
[00:50:57] Speaker A: Look, I made an armadillo, and then I block.
[00:51:00] Speaker B: I.
Holy.
[00:51:03] Speaker A: Holy.
I, like, I'm. I'm. I turn around and, like, I try to block the fact that she's wearing any boot, like, just subtly, like, with my leg, like, as if blocking any foot viewing. And I'm like, wow, nice armadillo.
Tell this kid that he's a kid and he's got to be careful in Gully's End. Or he's got to, like, maybe stay in a different town while we go into the city of Gully's End.
[00:51:28] Speaker C: Yeah, I don't know why, Will. I don't know why you don't just give him your rocket boots.
Have you thought about that? I mean, then he would be safe.
[00:51:37] Speaker A: Yeah, that's not enough. You know what I'm saying? Even if he had those. It's not enough.
It's not enough, Shimi.
[00:51:47] Speaker B: Right.
Okay. Well, you did well.
[00:51:49] Speaker C: How is he gonna protect himself?
[00:51:51] Speaker B: Will did give me the boots.
[00:51:53] Speaker A: Shimi, sometimes you have no idea how to. This is. This is. This doesn't prove that you are able to keep up.
[00:52:01] Speaker B: Why? Because I trust our allies.
[00:52:03] Speaker C: Will, are you trying to lie?
[00:52:06] Speaker A: Not trying to lie. I did lie.
[00:52:09] Speaker C: Murphina stamps her foot.
[00:52:12] Speaker B: Technically, he just omitted the truth. I don't think he actually lied.
[00:52:15] Speaker A: All right.
[00:52:16] Speaker C: Sin of omission.
Naughty, naughty.
Well, I don't know what Shanny Gazoo you're trying to pull here, mister, but right now it seems to me that she is acting much more mature than you are.
[00:52:34] Speaker B: What?
[00:52:35] Speaker C: Rafina and her hands make a big blur. And it's a big exclamation point.
[00:52:45] Speaker A: Roscoe.
Roscoe's asleep.
[00:52:52] Speaker C: Roscoe flies away. Oh, Roscoe.
[00:52:55] Speaker E: Did you really call this name?
[00:52:56] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:52:59] Speaker E: He'Ll come over.
[00:53:04] Speaker A: Does he just shuffle over and stand there and say nothing?
[00:53:07] Speaker E: What did the. What did the Rufina accuse Will of lying about?
[00:53:14] Speaker B: Well, they were talking about.
[00:53:16] Speaker A: Yeah, because Will said that he didn't give Shimi anything Or like didn't do that. Or it just didn't say that he did that. And then she was like, well, you did give me the boots.
[00:53:26] Speaker B: And then you were like, that proves that you're not ready to.
[00:53:29] Speaker A: Yeah, like, let's not talk about that.
[00:53:35] Speaker E: Yeah, Roscoe comes over, he's like.
[00:53:44] Speaker A: All right, Roscoe will just puts his head in his hands like, I'm calling these people over and nobody's gonna help me.
All right, listen, Roscoe, tap into that part of you that sometimes gives good advice. Remember when we sat on the beds and you were like, don't be mad at Bathwack. And I'm like, shut the up. Do that. But right now. But don't talk about bathwack. Let's. Where the hell is that guy? Just nobody talked to him. Anyway. Shimi is a child and we never got him armor and we're all stupid. And so I'm telling him that maybe he doesn't want to go to Gully's End or maybe he needs to stay far away or something and he just is acting like he's a grown ass man.
[00:54:29] Speaker B: I mean, I just a few minutes ago said I was a precocious lad.
[00:54:33] Speaker D: Sure, someone should turn him into a chicken and leave him with the chickens.
No, sorry, I don't actually.
[00:54:39] Speaker C: But you're not there.
[00:54:40] Speaker D: I'm not there.
Then we'll get him on our way out.
[00:54:47] Speaker E: Do you, you think that, that Jamie should stop traveling with us?
[00:54:53] Speaker A: I am very concerned about Shimmy and his, his too confident attitude with what we're heading into is all I'm saying. And I think that you might be able to say something that will break a spirit just enough.
I'm looking for some backup here. I was already trying to break a spirit, but it didn't work. I'm hoping that somebody can help me out.
[00:55:17] Speaker C: Some backup despair.
[00:55:20] Speaker E: Backup despair?
I mean, you know, I, I, I've been known to.
And I kind of provoke, trying to provoke Jimmy with, with the suggestion that one of us was going to be kicked out of a group and that should probably be him.
But frankly, you know, I, Sheami seemed to have been audio group long before I came along.
So I don't know at what point did it, did it start becoming too dangerous for him?
[00:56:01] Speaker A: At all points, at all points have I been trying to get rid of Shimi even though he. I'm not trying to say that you're not useful, but I'm just. We're heading into this. Am I the only grown up here? I don't understand Will's worried because of.
[00:56:15] Speaker B: The word pugilistic, which means, like punishing.
[00:56:20] Speaker A: Yes, we're not heading into Bear Toggle anymore. Land of a Thousand Hugs.
[00:56:35] Speaker B: Hey everyone, if you like what you hear, please leave us a kind review wherever you listen to us. Also, consider supporting us by subscribing to us on ko [email protected] supportpfd where you can gain access to lots of exclusive treats and behind the scenes goodies. Thanks for listening and we'll see you next time.
